It can be hard, even for myself, to keep track of my current special interests, for my specific special interests keep varying from times to times.

Currently, I'd summarize as: I'm trying to somehow rescue and resurrect (or, rather, spin off one myself, as archæology says there aren't records of this) Mesopotamian worship and invocation of Goddess Ereshkigal/Alatu (who's an older identity and name for Goddess Lilith, as per Burney Relief).

I went all the way into using ORACC ePSD2 (electronic Sumerian dictionary maintained by University of Pennsylvania) together with David Halloran's Sumerian Lexicon 4.0 and Wiktionary (oh, and FWIW, no AI; AIs aren't even able to output Sumerian and Akkadian with the proper meaning discovered by assyriological archæology, to begin with).

I designed an art with Ereshkigal's name (as faithful as possible to scribes' calligraphy seen on tablets such as CDLI's P393779) which is likely going to become a t-shirt for myself (part of the drawing is seen as my current PFP). I want to bear Her name just like I already do with a "tattoo" carefully made on my left forearm after the Seal of Lilith (the one with the symbol of Saturn sitting atop a vertical line and cross-like markings at every extremity, originally inside a circle which I deliberately omitted as the circle is meant by Goetians to "bind" the dæmon to the practitioner's Will and one shouldn't even dare to try "binding" a powerful Goddess to begin with, so the circle-less sigil is meant to call out to Her without the "binding the dæmon" part, meaning She's totally free to do as She Will; ideally I'd do an actual tattoo but I never made a tattoo before, also I can't afford one, so this, together with the urge to do some "things" to my biological garment and to use my "vital chemistry" in an actual ritual I performed, made me do a permanent mark in my own "Poor Man's way" a long time ago; a very faint scar beautifully managed to become permanent on my skin; maybe one day I'll make a tattoo on top of it, making it further visible 😄).

Currently, currently (as in, since yesterday), I'm trying to design an actual divination board (a custom Ouija board) with Ancient Near East writing (Latin alphabet got replaced by the 22 Hebrew letters; "Yes" became 𒀭𒈾 an-na which is Old Babylonian for a literal "yes", "No" became ?𒉡 in-nu; I don't have the "in" cuneiform to paste ATM but I wrote it by hand on my drawing, with several actual clay tablets as visual reference; maybe I'll ditch Hebrew and try using Proto-Sinatic alphabet instead), and owl-related symbolism (especially a Bubo virginianus "Great horned owl" drawn at the Moon side of the Ouija board, defiantly facing a Corvus corax "Common raven" drawn at the Sun side, inspired by the fact that owls and ravens have a natural conflict; also, to me, ravens are to Lucifer as owls are to Lilith (I worship both as complementary forces in an ideal union through the unified archetype of Baphomet, although I'm biased towards the Lilith side)).

After I complete the design, I'll print it (hoping I can do it in a Brazilian stationery shop without triggering any bigoted questioning from christians) and use its printing as a basis to somehow carve it to an actual wooden board (I have a digital soldering iron which also serves as a burning pen on wood), so gnoses could happen through something other than my mind (maybe I'll also end up getting some clay and somehow making a majestic owl figurine for myself, with my own hands like I digitally did in Blender a few months ago, to further complement my modest personal shrine and to follow me to my tombstone when I finally leave this world behind).

(I wonder whether the things I just described are special interests, hyperfixation/hyperfocus, or both, or entirely something else such as Geschwind's hyperreligiosity)

!autism@lemmy.world