How can i stop feeling like a loser? (lemmy.ml)

submitted 1 week ago by curious_beetle@lemmy.ml to c/asklemmy@lemmy.world

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I often feel like a loser. I don’t do any sports, but i’ve been wanting to get back into swimming since i used to do it as a kid and i kind of miss it, i don’t play any instruments, and there are days once every two or three weeks where i’m just home all day. I am addicted to my phone, or rather addicted to YouTube, i am watching YT videos most of my day, not even watching but often just leave them in the background and go on with my day. I have accomplished some cool stuff, like i just recently got out of morbid obesity by following a diet, i got my English C1 certification and i’m learning Spanish and Mandarin with surprisingly good results. I have been studying stuff i’m interested in, mainly politics, philosophy, and most recently I’m getting more into maths and physics. However, even tho i did achieve those things, i feel like i should do more.

I have always envied people that play instruments but never got around to do it myself (one friend of mine proposed to borrow me his old guitar, i might accept), i don’t workout currently because for the past 2 years i got a gym membership but didn’t care enough to show up consistently because it’s just boring to me, i’d like to go out more but many of my friends are always busy or just out of reach, and i live a bit far from the city so i can’t just “take a walk”, because i’d have nowhere to go and for a big portion of the road near my house there is no sidewalks at all.

I feel like i’m just making up excuses, but idk, do you know how i can stop feeling that way?

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[-] underscores@lemmy.zip 2 points 1 week ago

You're feeling like a loser because you are comparing yourself to standards that you will not satisfy

What I mean to say is society has created these bullshit standards for you to accomplish and they do not align with your goals, you will likely never compare yourself with the societal standard and be satisfied as a result

Think of who you want to be in the future and only have your goals and aspirations in mind

I play guitar and I can for sure tell you that within a year of practice you will be able to play a lot of pop guitar songs with ease, in fact that could be a goal to set and help you clear your mindset "I will start learning guitar and in one year I will aim to be able to play easy pop songs I like"

Notice that this goal is not related to societal standards, which extends to projections of you think people think of you

this post was submitted on 16 Oct 2026

39 points (93.3% liked)

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