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this post was submitted on 17 Oct 2026
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Fun fact: choking during sex is the second most common cause of stroke in women under 40. Source.
When you cut off blood supply to the brain you start damaging it real fast. There are studies measuring blood biomarkers of neural injury and inflammation in women who report being chocked during sex and it's clear that choking causes brain damage. According do experts there's no safe way to do it. It's just another disturbing, violent trend popularized by porn.
I always heard that you/your partner should squeeze the sides of the neck so that it gives the sensation of being choked without actually blocking air/bloodflow
Blaming sexual violence on porn seems the same kind of cheap virtue-signalling as blaming gun violence on video games.
Being choked feels good. Your partner sometimes asks you to choke them, sometimes in the heat of the action.
The most important thing is that there really is no safe way to do it, and it should be never done. Upvoted your post for visibility. For the sceptics, here is an article (in German) about one medical doctor accidentally killing another during sex.
Thankfully my wife is over 40, so it looks like we dodged that bullet.
Why does it have to be about violence and porn? Talk about the dangers all you want but that shit just genuinely feels like crack. You get flooded with brain chemicals that feel euphoric. Focus on the important bits about the risks rather than applying stupid moral judgements.
Ok but you do realize how comparing it to crack is not helping here right
Like I'm more than happy to also warn people to stay tf away from crack lol
I'm not disagreeing that it's dangerous, I'm saying the moralizing is unnecessary and pointless when it has real, addictive effects to focus on instead.
Thank you for speaking up and posting this source. I know you and I haven't historically gotten on well, but I fully agree with you here.
Mfw I browse the fediverse daily and am aware of some of the conflict that has gone down between y'all. I am on Lemmy too much lmao
The euphoria is from the hypoxia, I think. In which case, a similar high could be had by scheduling sexy times in an oxygen tent mountain climbers and endurance athletes use for training.
It has nothing to do with euphoria. From the source:
In 2021, a research team led by Debby Herbenick, provost professor at the Indiana University School of Public Health, interviewed 24 women aged 18 to 33 in depth about their experiences of strangulation during sex. Although, for most, their first experience had involved no prior discussion – including one who was having sex for the first time – the majority now viewed it as “routine and regular”. All believed it was safe, despite experiencing many physical reactions, including coughing, gasping, difficulty swallowing and breathing and vision changes. Some said they accepted being choked for their partner’s pleasure, even though they didn’t personally find it arousing. Others did enjoy it and sought it out as “adventurous” and “exciting”.
The paper notes that historically, autoerotic asphyxiation is rare among women and adds, “It is curious how sexual asphyxiation, which has long been described as predominantly engaged in by/for men’s arousal, has become so frequently enacted by men on women partners.”
Bows makes the same point. “What’s not being talked about is that this is happening overwhelmingly to women by men. If you accept what people will argue – that this is an activity that’s enjoyed because it’s ‘sensual’ – then why aren’t men the recipients more often? To me, it’s just another way we’ve culturally legitimised men harming women.”
It just keeps going like that. It's really wroth reading.
I'd be interested to know the source on this, because I know plenty men who are into this. Even in the paragraph prior it states, "sexual asphyxiation, which has long been described as predominantly engaged in by/for men’s arousal."
That said, full consent and knowledge about the potential long-term physical harm are absolutely critical
It says "The paper notes that historically, autoerotic asphyxiation is rare among women". So it seams to suggest that before choking your partner became common it was mostly men to chocked themselves while masturbating. Now it's mostly men that choke women. It doesn't say it doesn't happen to men, just that women were not into it before and now it happens to them more.
idk if you were trying to be funny or not, but it is driving me INSANE:
choking*
Fixed 😅
idk if you were trying to be funny or not, but:
You're*
Yaruoe'''e*
It’s a little funny when people correct others spelling mistakes in the same thread where they also have made spelling mistakes, that’s all haha
I'm just being funny, I agree, it's always a bit cringe when people correct others on their spelling while spelling their reply incorrectly 😅
Like if you're gonna be a pedant, be a pedant correctly
It's a very poorly written paper that is using generalizations without a proper source or study group.
A sample size of 24 to make these broad assumptions is frankly ridiculous
This is such a crazy extrapolation to me, especially as someone who has had a girlfriend die from (EXTREMELY STUPIDLY) doing unsupervised breath play on herself.
Here is the Guardian article that ExLisper already linked.
Here is the paper that the Guardian references.
I get what your saying, but I think a lot of women do enjoy it for MANY different reasons, most unhealthy. I am one who enjoys it, so there is that-
No one is saying that there's no women that enjoy choking. I still wouldn't say it's a lot of women.
I don't understand why you're quoting the same thing to me that I responded to?
I put the links under the quote to both the article and the original paper.
You asked for the sources.
Yeah if you're actually choking your partner you're doing it wrong
Lightly squeezing someone's throat during sex is choking only in name. You're not supposed to full on choke them out.
Reminder that any sexual choking is now illegal in Australia
I can’t find a source that verifies your claim.
You might be thinking of the ban on strangulation in porn that was passed in the UK recently?
Basically, you cannot consent to it; even if sober, or you sign a waiver.
Though not broadly different from other State and Territory laws the legal firms advice that is linked in the article relates to NSW law and does not indicate that all sexual strangulation is unlawful.
Your claim, and the articles claim, regarding the legality of sexual strangulation is untrue on the grounds that sexual strangulation may be performed in a way that is consensual, does not result in harm, loss of consciousness or death.
It is not explicitly illegal according to Federal, State or Territory law.
Here's another one:
Theoretically, if the stranglee never gets injured, and they don't tell anyone, then you might not get in trouble. However, since it has such a high injury rate, if they end up in hospital, you might face criminal charges. Even if they have a therapist and say that they are choked during sex, then it's a mandatory reporting thing at that level too. Just don't choke people lol it's extremely dangerous and legally risky
Advocating for abstinence is a losing strategy as noted in the article.
I’m not interested in sexual choking, though I do choke people out occasionally in martial arts training, I was interested only in the claim regarding legality.
OK but what if I really like being choked a little
Not that I'm under 40. Or a woman.
It's like any other risky behavior - there's still a risk, but ultimately it's up to you if you want to risk death in pursuit of orgasm.
Haha people get so pissy about reality - I'm a domme and engage in some choking, but have strict rules around it. It is silly to pretend there's 0 risk to choking. Be informed and get consent.
Just a little throat clenching, not enough to get fuzzy, just enough to make breathing a bit harder, and to remind me that I'm her property
JFC, what kind of porn are you people watching?
Read to source. Choking became mainstream in porn.
That was a horrifying read. I had no idea. Thank you for the context.