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submitted 1 day ago* (last edited 14 hours ago) by cass1312@piefed.blahaj.zone to c/mtf@lemmy.blahaj.zone

I saw a post earlier (not on the fediverse), about a trans woman who had a date with a cis man who was pretty clearly into her, fliriting and stuff, but then as soon as she told him she was trans the guy immediately acted different, said he wasn't into her and just wanted to be friends, etc. The poster was obviously upset by that and was trying to vent about it online in a women's community who claim to be trans inclusive, but so many of the replies were about how he wasn't transphobic, how he was such a good guy for giving her the bare minimum respect after learning she was trans, how its not transphobic to not be attracted to trans people, etc. That's also not even what the poster was saying, she just wanted support after a shitty date, something which the community is perfectly capable of doing when a cis woman is seeking it.

But also like the guy was attracted to her! He just immediately changed his mind upon learning she was trans, which is literally just transphobia, holy shit. And almost all the supportive people in the comments or anyone saying that were getting piled on.

I already know the majority of cis people don't see us as actually being our gender/sex, but it still fucking sucks everytime I see something like that that reminds me of that fact so starkly.

Edit: The number of cis people coming in to this thread and doing the exact same fucking thing I'm complaning about in this post is wild holy shit. Like congrats on not having any ability to read the room l guess lmao.

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[-] Edges@lemmy.zip 20 points 23 hours ago

Its impossible for people to just be supportive of someone having a bad time if they have OPINIONS about the situation at hand. Like a vein about to burst if they don't get a chance to lay out their exact beliefs in fine detail.

Its ok to be like "fuck that BS girl his loss" and leave it there.

[-] cass1312@piefed.blahaj.zone 10 points 23 hours ago

Yeah exactly like this is a post about a girl having a shitty experience with a guy, they get posts like this all the fucking time. It's practically the point of the community! Only on this one did the comments turn into lecturing the girl for expressing frustration at her date and dating in general though, mysteriously.

[-] KimLuff@lemmy.blahaj.zone 5 points 21 hours ago

Everyone knows why and should call it out too. It's bigotry towards trans people plain and simple. People expect us to be ok with being treated worse. That's bullshit!

this post was submitted on 06 Nov 2026
59 points (91.5% liked)

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