And Finally...

Government so small it can fit in your bedroom!

How were they enforcing this?

*trying to buy salad ingredients for the family cookout*

The cashier: sorry state prevents us from selling more than 5 cucumbers at a time.

Is there a shortage of dildos in Texas that they need such laws to stop hoarding?

I’m guessing they are not limiting the number of guns you can own though.

Why are so many people using them in Walmart?

First, they came for the dildos, and I did nothing.

Look, I have SIX perfectly fine dildos, all in their individual velvet pouches. My grandma even gives me a knowing wink when she sees them on my nightstand (she's very with-it, my grandma). But the minute I walk into Walmart and snag NUMBER SEVEN - BAM! 💥 The world implodes. Little Timmy starts twerking in the cereal aisle, the self-checkout beeps incessantly with unholy vibrations, and a rogue bag of gummy worms spontaneously transforms into a life-size silicone replica of the Lone Star State... it's CHAOS, I tell ya! This clearly-reasonable six-dildo limit is PROTECTING our precious Texas innocence. Seven just unleashes the primal urges, and nobody wants that, especially not while picking out a new can of Copenhagen. 🤠

#SixIsTheMagicNumber #TexasStrong #ProtectTheInnocence (and the Gummy Worms)

Snorted and almost choked on my coffee when I scrolled past this.

The worst part about this is that I'd rather Republicans waste time with pointless legislation such as this rather than something damaging that they could actually enforce.

This has very strong “If I can’t make my wife come, nobody will ~~cum~~ come!” vibes.

There are definitely some Texas billionaires that own more than six politicians.

Neo-puritanism needs to die. I'm getting excited because I think humanity is just generally getting fed up with control. We're done with this shit.

At least none of these people should be violent. They can have their views. But law is always violent. So it has no business being an extension of anyone's sexual views. If you violently impose your sexual perspective on others you are as good as a rapist in my book.

Rofl, they were afraid for their right to bear arms instead of their right to bear dildos.

The solution is clearly to set up sex toy libraries.

...They would never interfere with libraries, right?

I would never have thought to go to walmart to buy a sex toy if I hadn't seen them somewhat prominently displayed on my way towards the vitamin aisle.

So its now illegal to have more than 6 bananas in your home in Texas?

Sigh, this is gonna be an awkward call to mom..

The new top post in this community. I hope everyone is proud of themselves. I know I am.

Ted Cruz ran out and is trying to hoard them all for himself.

What if it was a dildo-gun?

Don’t want to start WWIII but even I and my fifty buttplugs were surprised to hear that WALMART was selling sex toys.

For those curious to read the penile penal code see 43.23(f): https://statutes.capitol.texas.gov/Docs/PE/htm/PE.43.htm#43.23

Texas is weird.

Policemen Josh and Wade showing up to a party:

Josh: "Alright Wade, let's make sure there are not more than 6 erections in there."