https://www.wikihow.com/Mind-Your-Own-Business
Alone I guess? In solitude. At least I wouldnβt be bothering anyone else.
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https://www.wikihow.com/Mind-Your-Own-Business
Alone I guess? In solitude. At least I wouldnβt be bothering anyone else.
How to drink Prune Juice
Disaster Preparedness > home security
How to Make a Tripwire: Best Methods
Craft a DIY tripwire with this guide
So⦠an accident involving a tripwire boobytrap that I set up?
Learning how to fight girls...
How to treat a collapsing trachea in chihuahuas
Not sure if I'm the chihuahua or the one treating the chihuahua in this case
How to measure your pants
Died running indoors with limited space.
Balancing a Motorcycle Tire. Seems reasonable.
Died eating sea urchins... Yeah that kind of tracks actually.
"How to dispose of mercury"
Huh, that's actually more realistic than I thought
Uh oh.
https://www.wikihow.com/Write-Your-Own-Eulogy
Well, at least I was prepared.
An exceedingly dangerous activity indeed.
uh oh
"what to do when someone texts you an apple emoji."
I'm extremely curious to see how this plays out.
βmaybe I shouldn't have texted that reaction to his apple emoji, but it felt right in that moment"
Random excerpt from the late Throbbing_Banjo discography.
I guess that's pretty close
:(
"How to confront a cheating husband"
That actually makes sense as a way to die, I just need to become gay now.
It's OP hitting on me π³
Walking a Guinea pigβ¦ they must be absolutely ferocious little thingsβ¦
I WARNED YEH!
DIDN'T I WARN YEH?
https://www.wikihow.com/Grow-Dates-Indoors
Guys I'm scared, my wife has been trying to grow dates indoors. Send for help, my time is near.
"Died unblocking my sacral Chakra."
Apparently "Doing One-Armed Pushups like a Pro"
So, focused physical exertion.
Or a head trauma from a hand slip while doing the pushups
How to cut wispy bangs. Well I'd gladly die before having bangs again.
how to: make hot chocolate with powdered cocoa.
https://www.wikihow.com/Use-the-Poke-Radar
Looks like I die playing an old PokΓ©mon game. Nostalgia must hit.
Comforting a dying cat :(
https://www.wikihow.com/Get-a-Middle-School-Crush-to-Like-You
UUUHHHHH
monday
inhales
I like coming here.
In break times, i often get to see her, with her long skirt, her adorable jacket, and her soft, long, brown hair.
She is rather tall in her friend group, she must be 13, maybe 14...
It doesn't stop me for loving her even if i am in my 40's.
Nothing can.
It's not a barbaric attraction like thoses weird pedophiles.
My love is pure.
She's made to be mine.
"I want to be with her together."
tuesday
She just leaved the school to buy her meal.
Today she did attach her hairs into two braids, with ribbons at the ends.
She is so cute.
"I absoluetly want to be with her"
She seems to be alone right now.
"Is it my chance?"
Slowly, gently, silently, I put some chloroform on the piece of cotton.
Softly, purely, nicely, I approach her from behind.
Strangely, surprisingly, quickly, she does a barrel roll and a backflip, and face me with an assault rifle.
Rougly, straightly, immediatly, she say: "ladies and gentleman, we got him"
Painly, horribly, trementously, i get perfored multiple times by supersonic projectiles, and fall on the ground.
"aww man"
I just died trying to get a middle school crush to like me.
Guys don't call the police it's for the thing
FBI OPEN UP
Yes, dying from the most dangerous of human endeavors: small talk.
I spent way to long thinking it was "How to make Scorpion man miss you". Thought I was gonna get stung.