this post was submitted on 10 Feb 2025
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Asklemmy

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[–] CookieOfFortune@lemmy.world 3 points 5 hours ago

https://www.wikihow.com/Mind-Your-Own-Business

Alone I guess? In solitude. At least I wouldn’t be bothering anyone else.

[–] VinesNFluff@pawb.social 2 points 7 hours ago

How to drink Prune Juice

[–] brognak@lemm.ee 3 points 8 hours ago
[–] ICastFist@programming.dev 2 points 7 hours ago (1 children)
[–] Irelephant@lemm.ee 2 points 6 hours ago

I was thirsty okay?!

[–] dizzy@lemmy.ml 2 points 7 hours ago

Disaster Preparedness > home security

How to Make a Tripwire: Best Methods

Craft a DIY tripwire with this guide

So… an accident involving a tripwire boobytrap that I set up?

[–] cepelinas@sopuli.xyz 2 points 8 hours ago

Learning how to fight girls...

[–] NichtElias@sh.itjust.works 3 points 9 hours ago

How to treat a collapsing trachea in chihuahuas

Not sure if I'm the chihuahua or the one treating the chihuahua in this case

[–] Madblood@lemmy.world 2 points 8 hours ago
[–] Evildave@lemmy.world 6 points 23 hours ago
[–] Surp@lemmy.world 3 points 22 hours ago

How to measure your pants

Died running indoors with limited space.

[–] moktor@lemmy.world 2 points 21 hours ago

Balancing a Motorcycle Tire. Seems reasonable.

[–] CapriciousDay@lemmy.ml 2 points 21 hours ago

Died eating sea urchins... Yeah that kind of tracks actually.

[–] Scrath@lemmy.dbzer0.com 3 points 1 day ago

"How to dispose of mercury"

Huh, that's actually more realistic than I thought

[–] CrabAndBroom@lemmy.ml 3 points 1 day ago
[–] communism@lemmy.ml 11 points 1 day ago (1 children)
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[–] Schmoo@slrpnk.net 6 points 1 day ago

An exceedingly dangerous activity indeed.

[–] umbrella@lemmy.ml 7 points 1 day ago
[–] Throbbing_Banjo@midwest.social 6 points 1 day ago (1 children)

"what to do when someone texts you an apple emoji."

I'm extremely curious to see how this plays out.

[–] Darkenfolk@dormi.zone 2 points 1 day ago

β€œmaybe I shouldn't have texted that reaction to his apple emoji, but it felt right in that moment"

Random excerpt from the late Throbbing_Banjo discography.

[–] cone_zombie@lemmy.ml 3 points 1 day ago

I guess that's pretty close

[–] KSPAtlas@sopuli.xyz 2 points 1 day ago (1 children)
[–] Redex68@lemmy.world 7 points 1 day ago

"How to confront a cheating husband"
That actually makes sense as a way to die, I just need to become gay now.

It's OP hitting on me 😳

[–] binary45@lemmy.world 1 points 22 hours ago

Walking a Guinea pig… they must be absolutely ferocious little things…

[–] sangriaferret@sh.itjust.works 14 points 1 day ago (1 children)
[–] tetris11@lemmy.ml 7 points 1 day ago

I WARNED YEH!
DIDN'T I WARN YEH?

[–] GlennicusM@beehaw.org 1 points 22 hours ago

https://www.wikihow.com/Grow-Dates-Indoors

Guys I'm scared, my wife has been trying to grow dates indoors. Send for help, my time is near.

[–] NutWrench@lemmy.ml 1 points 23 hours ago

"Died unblocking my sacral Chakra."

[–] Skeletonek@lemmy.zip 8 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Ok, so I guess I'll need to move to the USA in the future

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[–] lama@lemmy.world 6 points 1 day ago

Lol at least this kind of makes sense: https://www.wikihow.com/Take-Clenbuterol

[–] LowtierComputer@lemmy.world 2 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Apparently "Doing One-Armed Pushups like a Pro"

So, focused physical exertion.

[–] ICastFist@programming.dev 1 points 7 hours ago

Or a head trauma from a hand slip while doing the pushups

How to cut wispy bangs. Well I'd gladly die before having bangs again.

[–] vfreire85@lemmy.ml 1 points 1 day ago

how to: make hot chocolate with powdered cocoa.

[–] Sam_Bass@lemmy.ml 2 points 1 day ago
[–] Makeshift@sh.itjust.works 2 points 1 day ago

https://www.wikihow.com/Use-the-Poke-Radar

Looks like I die playing an old PokΓ©mon game. Nostalgia must hit.

[–] Feathercrown@lemmy.world 2 points 1 day ago

Comforting a dying cat :(

[–] TheGuyTM3@lemmy.ml 23 points 2 days ago (1 children)

https://www.wikihow.com/Get-a-Middle-School-Crush-to-Like-You

UUUHHHHH


monday


inhales

I like coming here.

In break times, i often get to see her, with her long skirt, her adorable jacket, and her soft, long, brown hair.

She is rather tall in her friend group, she must be 13, maybe 14...

It doesn't stop me for loving her even if i am in my 40's.

Nothing can.

It's not a barbaric attraction like thoses weird pedophiles.

My love is pure.

She's made to be mine.

"I want to be with her together."


tuesday


She just leaved the school to buy her meal.

Today she did attach her hairs into two braids, with ribbons at the ends.

She is so cute.

"I absoluetly want to be with her"


She seems to be alone right now.

"Is it my chance?"

Slowly, gently, silently, I put some chloroform on the piece of cotton.

Softly, purely, nicely, I approach her from behind.

Strangely, surprisingly, quickly, she does a barrel roll and a backflip, and face me with an assault rifle.

Rougly, straightly, immediatly, she say: "ladies and gentleman, we got him"

Painly, horribly, trementously, i get perfored multiple times by supersonic projectiles, and fall on the ground.

"aww man"

I just died trying to get a middle school crush to like me.


Guys don't call the police it's for the thing

[–] Odo@lemmy.world 8 points 1 day ago

Yes, dying from the most dangerous of human endeavors: small talk.

[–] rustyricotta@lemmy.ml 7 points 1 day ago

I spent way to long thinking it was "How to make Scorpion man miss you". Thought I was gonna get stung.

[–] stiephelando@discuss.tchncs.de 28 points 2 days ago (2 children)

I'm dying in a religious conflict

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