this post was submitted on 14 Feb 2025
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ImGoingToHellForThis
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i mean, why do you think christians hate sex? They don't want to be forced to watch their descendants fuck for the rest of eternity
That would make me nut instantly.
Yo, if she's a real granny, she's going to be spelling out how to hit the right spot, so her young'n can get her fun too.
I'm middle aged, and even my one grandmother would give a wink and some advice quietly to the side when one of us grandkids would get married. Not as graphic as my jokier first part, but genuine if humorously framed advice to be an attentive lover. And their generation was long before the sexual revolution.
My mom is a grandma now, and I know damn good and well she'll give some helpful hints to my kid, and my niece. She sure as fuck gave me some great advice, as well as access to good literature, that has served me well my entire life.
Shit, I'm kicked back recovering from a day at the hospital with my dad, and his advice still sticks in my head too. He had overhead me and a friend talking about shit we had zero clue of. He took me to the side and said not to listen to other boys because there was no way they had anything useful to say. Then he said that no matter what else happens, be gentle unless she says not to be; be loving unless she says not to be.
And that shit is real shit. It's the essence of being an attentive and considerate lover.
It also gibes very much with what my grandmother said to me with a laugh; to always take the time to make sure my wife has as much fun as I do, because if you turn it into a race and get there first, you lose. That's some real shit too. Like, damn mamaw, watching me at forty finally getting married, and still looking out for me. Using a little humor to deliver a little advice and a whole lot of love. Damn I miss both my grandmothers.
You know, thinking back on it, all the women that helped raise me put in the effort to help me be a good partner, sexually and emotionally. Like, my aunt pulling me aside after joking about a song being good for sex and telling me she knew it was a joke, but that's not the kind of thing someone would want to hear while doing that. Then, the next Sunday, bringing me a mix tape labeled "for the fun times", full of all the classic sexy songs that are good picks. How fucking boss is that?
Shit, now I'm shedding tears over a meme lol.