Dhs should take the classes the inventor of the lie detector offers on how to beat it
this post was submitted on 19 Feb 2025
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Despite polygraphs' unreliability, DHS insists they are necessary for national security.
in keeping with tradition, “national security” continues to mean “because i say so”.
People like her are dumb enough to believe "lie detector" tests are completely dependable and always print out perfectly clear "lie" and "not lie" results. Everyone else knows polygraph tests are inadmissible in court for a reason and require a lot of careful prep and interpretation. Even then, they're far from 100%.
What's the betting that this is the result of indiscreet dick waving from more MAGA centred members of staff?
Daily reminder that there's no such thing as an accurate lie detector test. Completely unscientific. Illegal to use except by government and it's basically a scare tactic/way to deny/fire people they don't have other cause for.
Ah, you have half of it.
Totally made up metrics but used by govt. Meaning that if there was ever an easy way to purge ICE and DHS of brown people, this is an easy, no fuss way to do it.
I reckon she’s also somewhat leaky.
What are the odds of her submitting to a test?
Zero.
If the lie detectors don't work, torture is always an option.
Do we call them the Gestapo yet or is it too soon?
Lie detectors don’t work except as an intimidation technique so, yes, it’s Gestapo time.
They work great...
At detecting how nervous someone is.
Just completely shut at detecting when someone's lying.
Yup. Sociopaths are invisible on the lie detector. Plus these days, it isn't that hard to build a biofeedback practice device so people control the metrics monitored by the polygraph.
Lie detectors are known to not work
Why is Noem wearing a bulletproof vest in a staff meeting?
Cuz she’s a bitch and she expects what she did to that dog
Realistic assessment of the mood of people forced to be around her?
Honestly ya may not be far off, humans even profligates like those in Trumps orbit have a generally good enough ability to detect when folks are pissed at them. When said pissed folks have access to weapons, are more intelligent than you, and probably think what you are saying is beyond stupid then well wearing a comfort vest is probably the only thing keeping her from booking it out of the room.
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She's LARPing.
Which is why she's ordered the lie detectors. They only know what they see in the movies, and lie detectors are one of their favorite devices.
She’s a very serious person with very serious things going on! /s
She’s worried someone will put her down like she did her dog
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You ever seen the dictator warlords constantly wearing miliary gear with too much polish and a thousand made up medals?
That's why.
Funniest thing about that is they only help in an all-out fire fight to protect your vital bits except the head which would have a helmet. She’s not going into any situation nearly so dangerous and if someone wanted to take her out, specifically, there’s plenty of options.
She might as well have a mall ninja sword strapped to her back.
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She wants to feel special
maybe animals lovers might not like her.
Just remember, it’s not a lie if you believe it. - George Costanza
It's a lie if the person interpreting the test says it is.
The card said moops
It should be pretty common knowledge that lie detector tests are completely bogus and can't be trusted. They're not admissible in court cases. Polygraph tests are proven to be made up pseudoscience.
They might as well try using crystal pendulum tests to dowse out the national security threats.
I want to point out - the results are inadmissible, but anything you say IS admissable.
A polygraph is an interrogation technique. And to this day I still don't know why they try to use it with so many things. Like security clearance. It doesn't really give them any insight into anything about you, other than if you like to run your mouth
Oooh, when do we get to deploy the E-Meters?
I’m going to sell divining rods to help find the immigrants.
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All the kings horses
and all the kings men
Couldn’t make Americans think
cops were bad again
Gucci just needs to come out with bullet proof vests. They won’t work for shit, but all the republican women will buy one.
“This isn’t a game,” Homan raged to the Associated Press. “We know that TDA is dangerous. Everybody can agree to that, but when they get a heads-up that we are coming, it’s only a matter of time before our officers are ambushed. Their job is dangerous enough. So we are going to address this very seriously.”
I don't think that leaking this is a good idea, but come on. If gangs find out in advance that they're about to be raided, are they going to disappear or seriously voluntarily going to stay and have a shootout with DHS?
Like, this can certainly mess up investigations, but I have a pretty hard time believing that it's going to get DHS agents killed.
I for one am very excited and sleep soundly now, knowing complete idiots are in control of the United States.
She gets her training and ideas from episodes of NCIS and CSI... and their neverending variants.
"Enhance. Enhance."
"Ma'am, images don't work that w-"
"YOU'RE NOT ENHANCING!"
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I like that her directive to combat leaking was itself leaked.
That is the single most ridiculous picture I've seen all week.
And that's saying something.
They’d be just as successful using a ouija board.
What makes you think they want to successful? They probably already identified their scapegoat, and just want to add a veneer of “proof”
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