Bonus Points: In the confusion, some of the assassinating Senators stabbed each other by accident.
this post was submitted on 10 May 2025
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I was gonna say, it may have been more of a logistics issue. I feel like once you get 5 or more people around someone, stabbing the shit out of them, it's probably hard to butt into the circle without catching a blade yourself, and I highly doubt they lined up single file.
If action movies have taught me anything, it's that a huge group vs one protagonist means all the baddies take turns kinda dancing in place until it's their time to stab.
"Queue up lads, get your stabbin' arm ready for a bit of pokey-pokey."
You put your dagger in You pull your dagger out You put your dagger in And you shake it all about You do the Pokey Pokey and you throw Ceaser out That's what it's all about!
That's why, when you've got a bunch of people attacking a kung-fu master, you've always got to attack one at a time. Otherwise you'll just get in each other's way.
Can confirm.
(I do LARPs sometimes, I have never rallied 4 friends to stab someone together IRL)
Roman senators: “We can’t even get bipartisan support for an assassination these days!”
I believe many of the stabs were from after he was already dead as well
If the twenty people in front of you have already had a stab then he's probably dead by the time it's your turn
It's a matter of principle.
C’mon, you agreed to stab him.
Man, he’s already been stabbed 22 times, he’s definitely dead now, there’s no point.
But you agreed!
Fine stabs there, see, I did it. He’s not really any deader than he was before though.
Alright, who’s next?
Rest of the senators: NOPE
Yea. The guy died. You don't beat a dead horse or stab a dead Ceasar.
Maybe some people just stabbed exactly the same spot? (cmo on man, I need the credits to graduate)
Nice to know politicians haven't changed
how many stab wounds?
For thousands of years, even among the people that knew "dirty jobs" need to be done, more than half won't do them.
It's possible Julius Caesar only sustained 5 wounds while he was alive, of which 1 was fatal. https://youtu.be/9XBxMk_plhA?t=1464