"The proper authorities have directed me to instruct you to immediately cease breathing, as it has been determined that you're wasting precious oxygen with deplorably low return on investment. I'd offer my condolences to your loved ones, but that'd be asinine since we both know you haven't got any."
The very molecules that comprise your being would be better put to use as the poop in my rectum
It's amazing you can type with your boxing gloves!
I might be too dense for this - is it a joke about traumatic brain injuries? (I'm not being snide!)
Callback to Strongbad, a fictional character who had a little side-show where he answered emails in boxing gloves to stay on-model.
IDK, the limiting factor for me is time, not my ability to read. Not every email is as necessary, important, or time-sensitive as the sender thinks it is, and some days I also gotta do other shit that isn't responding to emails.
General rules:
Exceptions may be made at the discretion of the mods.
