Iirc the actual wording used in the bibble was something like "showered her in gold." Take that how you like
I am not taking that.
TAKE IT BITCH
It tastes just like raisins
Oops, wrong thing.
GIVE IT BACK
By the stroke of his mane he turns into plane and he turns back again when you tug on his winkie!
Uh, that's dirty!
Do ya think so? Then I better not show you how the lemonade is made!
Ooo sweet lemonade, yes sweet lemonade!!
Zeus did it first. Can't believe he's just a copycat.
I know the term, but that's not how people get pregnant!
One can try.
That's not how you get someone pregnant!
Is this a challenge to a breed-off?
More like a pissing contest
Na, I'm out then. I'm rather uncoordinated currently as I'm sick and drinking amounts of ginger tea nobody should drink.
Can we have a breed-off in 3-5 business days then?
I would like to shower in God's golden shower
The Christian god must be shy as fuck to send a local manager with the package...
Probably not a serious answer, but as a tangent, iirc St. Thomas Aquinas believed that angels were not actual beings or messengers and didn't posses a soul. They are direct extensions of god, as we would have arms and legs as extensions or apendages, angels are the "arms and legs" of god.
Edit: because some people have shown interest, the idea that angels at some point rebelled against god and Lucifer became their leader is from a 1667 poem called Paradise Lost by John Milton.
Its an amazing work of fiction that ties in to some already existing mythos at the time (like the hierarchy of angels, from cherubs to seraphim) but it has nothing to do with what's in religious texts, either Jewish, Christian or Muslim.
So Gabriel was god’s dick?
That makes the whole story of Lucifer being the rebellious angel moot. Tools do not rebel.
They don't. The Lucifer rebellion against god is from Paradise Lost by John Milton (1667) and is not mythology or in any texts. Pure fiction, pretty amazing at that, but definitely doesn't have the same origin as the angels.
How can they rebell then?
You can't rebel unless it's in god's plan. Ergo, he's putting on a little puppet play and playing both sides.
The rebellion is from paradise lost, not in any religious text I thought? I'm no expert.
Restless leg syndrome
Maybe he's cheating us with other worlds and that was just his way of mass delivery
At least one of the gospels says that the Holy Spirit "comes upon" Mary and then she is pregnant. Gabriel was just the messenger that she would carry a child.
The story is different depending on which gospel you read
So god pulled out and came on her belly?🤔
Clearly his pull out game is weak then...
Wouldn't want to leave a paper trail while conceiving yourself
So the Christian god mpregged himself and instead of delivering it himself, he used a mortal human woman as surrogate mother¹?
¹(which would explain the whole pregnancy without jizz for Mary shenanigans)
Lazy is more like it. Dude hasn't even spoken to his kids in 2000 years.
What did I just read
it took me a while, but it's the nativity story. the angel gabriel knocks up mary and then asks if she came.
Gabriel didn't knock her up. The Holy Spirit came upon her (giggity). In other words, God himself/part of the trinity. Not a mere angel like Gabe or Mike.
Christianity is great--how many other religions were started when a wife cheated on her husband? And don't bring up Zeus because that shit was already in full swing when he started waving his dick(s) around.
IIRC, the titans before the olympians were just as much into infidelity and came from Gaea fucking Uranus (giggity).
I don't get it
You're Zeus, not Mary.
It's a joke about Mary becoming pregnant with Jesus. Although I'm not sure why Gabriel is the one doing it. At least one of the gospels says that the Holy Spirit "comes down upon" her to impregnate her and Gabriel was just the messenger who told Mary that she would carry a child.
Wait now, does this motherfuckwr have 3 dads are you telling me?
Merry Christmas
I'm pretty sure that 12 year old temple prostitute was preganant when Joseph won her by raffle.
I'm pretty sure that 12 year old temple prostitute was preganant when Joseph won her by raffle.
Pregananant
¡Prregante!
Microblog Memes
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