77
Remember to practice crossing your legs now, so that if/when you are ready to wear a skirt in public, you don’t accidentally attract uncomfortable attention.
I still don't get how this is (considered) a gendered thing. For me it is completely reliant on temperature. If I can comfortably cross my legs while sitting (on a chair or similar) I usually do. If my crotch gets too warm I uncross my legs.
Many of my male friends also cross their legs as do all the others.
The feminine leg cross is different from the masculine one. The feminine version has the thighs pressed together, whereas the masculine one leave some room. Its uncomfortable to squish your testes with your legs, but its fine if you're tucking, wearing compressive underwear, or don't have any.
I'm cis-male and I cross my legs with thighs together all the time.
Though I have to admit, that it used to be regarded as feminine/gay, when I was a teenager. I just don't care, because I don't let other peoples opinions keep me from sitting comfortably. YMMV, but I've always regarded the "my balls are getting squished" as more performative, to show what a manly man you are. Much like man-spreading.
But, well, gender being performative is the whole point here, I guess. So you might wan to pay attention to that.
The thing that would really make me feel feminine to the point, that even I avoid doing it, is sitting with your thighs parallel and thighs touching, knees pointing to one side and having your lower-legs angled to the other side. Kinda the opposite of man-spreading and it seems to work for short skirts as well.
If you are careful, there's nothing to worry about for most people, but when your balls sometimes are in the wrong position and you just suddenly cross without thinking, I'm pretty sure it is possible to squish them. But like, so I think squishing them when sitting down is also possible.
I was speaking from experience as a trans woman. Pre HRT, I wanted to sit ladylike but couldn't comfortably do so because of the balls. The estrogen shrunk the balls significantly so now its easier, but I do need compressive underwear to do the full knee over knee feminine leg cross comfortably.
I have only one Ball in my Ballsack basically (other one Shrunk due to Child Birth Related Things iirc at around 7 Years Old >.>) and for me its so easy to Cross my Legs so ive been doing it ever since Childhood really and obviously still now :P
Well, in this case, OP is wearing a skirt, so leaving your legs open while sitting means also exposing your underwear to whomever is sitting in front of you. Obviously it matters less if you’re wearing pants.
As far as gendered body language, it usually comes down to how you cross your legs. Depending on what you have between those legs, certain crossing positions can… squish things.
Since women are more likely to not have anything to squish and more likely to wear a skirt, they are conditioned to cross their legs more often. Men are more likely to not need to care about these things and are free to “man-spread”. This creates the gendered body language stereotype.
I think it has a lot to do with anatomy, specifically your thighs. Thigh gap = easier leg crossing. Don't quote me though because I'm cis and this is second hand info from my dad lol.
That breeze can be a great thing in summer. And you still get it even with longer skirts.
this post was submitted on 10 Jun 2026
77 points (100.0% liked)
Transfem
5789 readers
105 users here now
A community for transfeminine people and experiences.
This is a supportive community for all transfeminine or questioning people. Anyone is welcome to participate in this community but disrupting the safety of this space for trans feminine people is unacceptable and will result in moderator action.
Debate surrounding transgender rights or acceptance will result in an immediate ban.
- Please follow the rules of the lemmy.blahaj.zone instance.
- Bigotry of any kind will not be tolerated.
- Gatekeeping will not be tolerated.
- Please be kind and respectful to all.
- Please tag NSFW topics.
- No NSFW image posts.
- Please provide content warnings where appropriate.
- Please do not repost bigoted content here.
This community is supportive of DIY HRT. Unsolicited medical advice or caution being given to people on DIY will result in moderator action.
Posters may express that they are looking for responses and support from groups with certain experiences (eg. trans people, trans people with supportive parents, trans parents.). Please respect those requests and be mindful that your experience may differ from others here.
Some helpful links:
- The Gender Dysphoria Bible // In depth explanation of the different types of gender dysphoria.
- Trans Voice Help // A community here on blahaj.zone for voice training.
- LGBTQ+ Healthcare Directory // A directory of LGBTQ+ accepting Healthcare providers.
- Trans Resistance Network // A US-based mutual aid organization to help trans people facing state violence and legal discrimination.
- TLDEF's Trans Health Project // Advice about insurance claims for gender affirming healthcare and procedures.
- TransLifeLine's ID change Library // A comprehensive guide to changing your name on any US legal document.
- Rainbow Railroad // A non-profit international humans rights organization helping at risk LGBTQ+ people relocate to safety.
Support Hotlines:
- The Trevor Project // Web chat, phone call, and text message LGBTQ+ support hotline.
- TransLifeLine // A US/Canada LGBTQ+ phone support hotline service. The US line has Spanish support.
- LGBT Youthline.ca // A Canadian LGBT hotline support service with phone call and web chat support. (4pm - 9:30pm EST)
- 988lifeline // A US only Crisis hotline with phone call, text and web chat support. Dedicated staff for LGBTQIA+ youth 24/7 on phone service, 3pm to 2am EST for text and web chat.
founded 3 years ago
MODERATORS