Why are we conflating emotional intimacy and sex? They aren't the same thing. The fact that men are often taught that they are the same thing is part of why there is a loneliness epidemic.
because for a horny sad 20 year old they are the only thing that matters in life.
no mount of companionship will satisfy his desperate need to get laid.
See that's the thing - again, need for sex and need for emotional intimacy aren't the same thing. The propaganda that says they are is why those boys are both horny and sad - they're trying to meet two drives at once and failing both because of this misunderstanding. If they were emotionally stable and had community and belongingness, it'd actually be a lot easier for them to get laid and their mental health would also be way better.
have you ever been a 20 year old boy?
do you think any 20 year old boy could conceptualize the difference? part of growing up is learning things.
it's not propaganda, it's life. nobody at the age of 20 is stable, because they are still figuring out who they are. when i was 20 i had tons of friends and community and all that horse shit, but nothing mattered other than getting sex, because it felt so goddamn good and nothing else remotely compared to sex. it was the most satisfying experience i'd ever had in life at that point and continued to be so until i was like 30. drugs, food, parties, friends, family, none of that mattered a lick compared to the amazing feelings of sex with a girl that I liked. god, to this day those memories are the most strong, far more strong than my 'sense of belonging' at my university... was orgasmic super hard with a hot girl in my bed and laying there with her and spending time with her chilling and banging repeatedly. or studying together and taking fuck breaks every hour or so.
have of the 'mental health' crisis is just society pathological normal life, as it tightens the noose. you are not allowed to figure shit out anymore, apparent if you're 20 and you aren't full 'communting a belongingness' you're ill and need to be 'fixed' or 'corrected'.
god i'm in my fucking 40s and all i do is get lectured by semi-strangers irl about how 'problematic' I am for like owning a cat or other totally normal things. Or reading books. or a million other things people have randomly deecided are 'wrong and bad' that 10 years ago nobody cared about.
you sure the issue is the kids, or the fact the adults judging them are all paranoid perfectionist idiots who worship some ideal that doesn't exist in the real world and to which they are forever comparing themselves and everyone else, in despair? no... that can't be it... it's those stupid boys who are dumb. not us!
no kids, don't want sex, just want 'belongingness' that will totally... 'fufill' you... lol.. why not just medicate them into oblivion if your end goal is this kumbaya passive bullshit ideal? or castrate them! clearly that will fix their 'problem'.
i don't know why it's so hard for people to just admit sex is awesome and not having it sucks and it's one of the most joyful experiences in human life and it very much will make you feel less lonely when it's with someone you love and care about. this has become taboo talking point lately though, apparently wanting sex and love makes you an evil person now.... instead of being a default component of the human condition.
and rather than talk about it we just insist that 'community' will fix it or something... lol
I never said anything about being anti-sex so I think you're having an argument with someone that isn't me, hope you feel better.
You can have sex and be a totally toxic bastard that people don't want to be around once they get to know you. You could have sex frequently but still be deeply lonely.
Agreed. It's dangerous to conflate emotional intimacy and sex - they aren't the same thing and pretending they are is part of what got us into this mess imo.
The phasing is as a sudden historically unique crisis, not the generic sense of ennui common to adulthood throughout history.
I can show you black and white French films from the 1960s complaining about the same Male Loneliness
Be 2025
...years old?! Not happenin bud
There is a lot of solid scholarship questioning the label "male loneliness epidemic," but not because scholars are stupid enough to equate having sex with an absence of loneliness.
what these statistics hide is that they dont examine QUALITY OF LIFE , NUMBERR OF RELATIONSHIPS, TYPES OOF RELATIONSHIPS, and THE INSANE RATES OF DEATHS OF DESPAIR AMONGSTT MIDDLE AGED AND SENIOR MEN
https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC10721027/ for this study of Korean middle aged men and women it was found thatt those who met more often wiith theiir friends had higher reported levels of life satisfation . YES for men AND women (and ya ya those who reported being married ALSO had higher reportrd levels of life satisfaction too BUT it sshould be noted that wifdowed people reported even higher levels of life satisfaction than all other adults who were included in the study and currently lived alone)
About 70-80% of all deaths worldwide from 'Deaths Of Despair' (so that includes deatha from eatting a terrible diet without exercising and dying from a cardiovascular disease, deaths from drunk driving, deaths from deliberate suicide , deaths frrom accidental drug overdoses, deaths from alcohol poisoning, deaths from fatty liver diseases ) were deaths of men per a year since we've started measurinng it. And very much middle aged men.
Also havent some studies come out showing that people have reported having less friends or rsther less people that they talk to and confide in per a weeek or even per a month than ever before?
Your spouse is supposed to be one of your friends , ya I gett that. But if you rely on only your spouse as your only friend ? Youre gonna get into A LOOOT of trouble if they eventually divorce from you.
thx for the reply but i think your kkeyboard might be shaking. mignt want tc get it checked byy a mechanic?
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