Unhand me, cretin!!!

There is stiff competition, but I think this guy may be leading the pack in derpiness.
Ohmygod with that little tiny fang it's so cute I wanna throw up and kill myself
Make sure to clean out the vents and rafters/attic, bat guano has been found to cause histoplasmosis.
I had never heard of histoplasmosis. Neither has Firefox apparently as it wanted to correct the spelling. I know "histo" means lungs, but the "plasmosis" suffix made me think about toxoplasmosis (FF has not heard of that either! The dictionaries are likely limited to common words, I would think.).
What's the difference? Plenty!
https://www.differencebetween.com/what-is-the-difference-between-histoplasmosis-and-toxoplasmosis/
Edit: I'm a dummy. Histo means "tissue". Not lungs.

Why did Gould leave his bat?
It keeps signing expensive rental agreements in high-demand vacation spots with automatic renewal and onerous cancellation requirements.
Oooh the tiny wittle fwuffy!!! ~(つˆ0ˆ)つ。☆
ahem
Ehm yes, cute little animal isn't it?
My reaction exactly.
Eddie Munster?
Bats
Bats are cool
Bats are the only true flying mammals. There are over 1,400 species of bats, and they can be found on nearly every part of the planet. Not only are they cute, they are also important...
Studying how bats use echolocation has helped scientists develop navigational aids for the blind. Without bats’ pollination, seed dispersal, and pest control we wouldn’t have bananas, avocados, mangoes, agave, or cacao… that’s right, bats bring us tequila and chocolate!
Found a bat in need of help?
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Do not handle it with bare hands! Bats can carry rabies.
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Here's a map of worldwide rescues and temporary care instructions.
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Bats should never be kept as pets: Here's why.
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Our community's mascot is Baxter. Baxter is an Egyptian fruit bat that was cruelly kept alone and confined to a small cage for 12 years before being rescued by a bat sanctuary. You can read the full story by clicking on his name.
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