Doc: Who's president in 2025?
Marty: Donald Trump.
Doc: Donald Trump?! The dumbfuck?
Flipping on the TV
Lifestyles of the Rich and Famous is on
Donald Trump is talking about how he hopes his daughter is as fuckable as his second wife
"Mr. President!"
He would play Daft Punk and they wouldn’t be ready for it.
Nah dubstep
Naw, he'd play something more incomprehesible to the 90s, like skrillex or the later evolutions of the genre.
I feel like Dillon Francis is the right level of “starts out normal enough, then devolves into chaos”
I feel like he'd start talking in brain rot and be like, "Your kids are gonna love it."
Daft! Daft! It’s Marvin. Your cousin, Marvin Punk?
“Ladies and gentlemen of the class of ‘99… wear… sunscreen.”
Daft Punk were already around in 95 though
If back to the future was released today more than 1/3 of the population would root for biff and would say that the movie is "too political" and "woke propaganda".
Then again, being OK with child rape by that same group of people wasn't something I would have expected even 10 years ago... I knew they were brain-dead, just not that much....
If back to the future was released today more than 1/3 of the population would root for biff and would say that the movie is “too political” and “woke propaganda”.
That was half the joke of the original movie. Biff got super rich off cheating at sports gambling and was rewarded for his sudden financial success with political authority, because the writers of the movie knew that's how Americans respond to anyone who appears to be financially successful practically overnight.
Biff was a critique of the people who elected Ronald Reagan. People who were saying exactly the same fascist shit as MAGA Trumpies today.
Then again, being OK with child rape by that same group of people wasn’t something I would have expected even 10 years ago…
You must have slept through the whole Catholic Sex Abuse moment. The sex-crimes apologists were crawling out of the woodwork. Guys like Ross Douthat made their first nut trying to defend the indefensible. Half of the Peggy Noonan columns were just her whining about anti-Catholic bias every time another child-rape story broke. JD Vance made his Catholic Turn right in the middle of the scandal, seemingly to suck up to the rich Catholic fuckwits gullible enough to believe he was going to protect them.
Before that, you had the string of scandals at the Texas Youth Corrections office. And the Abramoff Scandal, which had an often-undercovered element of child sex trafficking in the Marianas Islands. And, of course, Epstein himself got off with multiple slaps on the wrist across multiple administrations, thanks to his DC (and Mossad) connections. All these people and institutions retained conservative support in the face of a deluge of accusations and a torrent of new victims coming forward.
Marty would be teenager from today. He'd be livestreaming Doc Brown's experiment. He'd see his dad watching the dancing baby in the 90s and be like, "I've seen this meme, it's classic". They'd be like, "wtf is a meme".
Marshall? It's your cousin, Marvin. Marvin Mathers.
You know that sound about Aunt Debbie's spaghetti you've been looking for? Well, listen to this!
Super Mario Brothers was released closer to WWII than to today.
Joe Biden was born closer to the inauguration of Abraham Lincoln than to his own.
Please for the love of all the gods do not give studio execs this idea or they'll be scrabbling for a remake.
The original director and screenwriter aren't allowing anyone to do a remake, so I guess we are safe as long as they are alive.
https://consequence.net/2025/07/back-to-the-future-why-no-remake-sequels/
Heroes
Marty would say "no cap" often causing Doc to ask what the future had to do with headwear.
"Does everyone wear hats in the future? Did the ozone hole get bigger?"
Funny the massive cultural change between the 1950s and the 1980s whereas it really feels like far, far less has changed between the 1990s and today.
Marty: "This is a blues riff in B, watch me for the changes, and try to keep up, OK?"
Proceeds to play Smooth by Santana and Rob Thomas.
I guess you guys aren't ready for that . . . but to your kids, it's gonna be a hot one
"Hey Carlos! Carlos, it's your cousin! It's your cousin - Enrique Santana. Hey, you know that new comeback sound you're looking for? Well listen to this!"
Holds cordless landline phone at the band
And then he'd be in the future of '56 where people are calling each other "choom" and solar power doesn't work cause of all the dust and pollution in the sky, but people wear two neckties sometimes.
Blame it on the Rain. I'd be like "oh I've seen these guys before, they lip sync and the guy on the left is about to die."
Dad crawls out from under the desk
“Hey hey hey, now we can surf the World Wide Web!”
Marty: “Hey I’ve seen this funny image before.”
Kid: “How have you seen it before? It just got posted.”
Marty: “Yeah, it’s a… repost.”
Kid: “What’s a repost?”
The song 1985 was released in 2004 which is 19 years after 1985 and 22 years before now.
My guess is that the time machine would be a Pontiac Grand Am.
Doc breathes you made a TIME machine catches breath out of a CyberTruck?
Einstein explodes
I think the difference is between how much things were chamging back then. The 50s were very different to the 80s. Technology changed completely and also the 80s were post-vietnam which caused huge changes in the culture. As for the 90s its all about digital technology and computers aaand so is today? Theres a reason for(at least for people arround me cause im gen z 💀) our grandparents being 'technology shocked' so much while our parents grew up sorta with the same stuff as us. Yes the access was different but my mom used to play pirated videogames on a computer at the library. That definitely wasnt a thing in the 50s. Thats my perspective at least. Also me being eastern european may influence this cause for us time and progression was locked for so long and the 80s freed all of it up.
In 1998, my father sent me to school with a pager you could leave voice messages on. My friends were amazed how advanced it was.
And Closing Time. If you hosted any kind of dance and you didn't end it with Closing Time, you were not clever.
That song didn't come out until '98. I guess Marty could play it, and they could change the name of the band leader to Marvin Semisonic.
Yeah, that's how time and math works
The more important question, what car would be the one modified ti become a time machine?
Based on the stainless steel body requirements, I know the answer and I don’t like it.
I think about joke in the movie would be its supposed to be a cyberpunk, but the vehicle falls apart during a test run, so they use a Ford focus instead.
If they remake BTTF with a Cybertruck we should burn down the movie studio
Watch as my corporeal form fades into dust.
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