this post was submitted on 02 Jan 2025
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Microblog Memes

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[–] BigPotato@lemmy.world 20 points 4 days ago (4 children)

Unfortunately, I'm a rifle and pistol skills trainer, handy enough with both power and non-power tools to barricade/build a functional shelter, a decent cook with barbones equipment, athletic enough to carry all that and still put in a days ruck, and multilingual enough that we won't have to kill everyone we come across right away...

Fortunately, my body regularly tries to kill me and I'll probably be in a coma before the month is out - so peace suckers.

[–] gamermanh@lemmy.dbzer0.com 9 points 4 days ago* (last edited 4 days ago)

I'm a rifle and pistol skills trainer

I'll probably be in a coma

5-long quest chain to wake you up since you're the rare trainer who can show me how to use the Buttfuckerator 5000 is what I'm getting from this

[–] SidewaysHighways@lemmy.world 4 points 4 days ago (1 children)

Like, this month? Or that first month of the Apocalypse?

Or yes I guess

[–] AhismaMiasma@lemm.ee 5 points 4 days ago

I'm guessing the first month without insulin, so somewhere between the two.

[–] Anticorp@lemmy.world 1 points 4 days ago (2 children)

Why are your skills unfortunate? The first word in your post is confusing to me.

[–] BigPotato@lemmy.world 2 points 4 days ago

It's unfortunate because I am skilled in things that would matter, so I'd likely survive the initial horrors if I'm not within blast radius and have to kill my family when they reanimate.

Fortunately I won't have to live with that long.

[–] chetradley@lemm.ee 2 points 4 days ago

I think what they're trying to say is that they wouldn't want to survive in an apocalypse, so it's unfortunate (ironic?) that they're apparently so well suited to it.