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Vibe parenting (lemmy.nz)
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[-] andros_rex@lemmy.world 33 points 1 day ago

It helps to be more specific.

Instead of “how was school,” try “what did you do in math class today?” Or “what was your favorite thing that happened in school today?”

Also for the love of God, set up an “observer” account in canvas or whatever your school uses. Have some knowledge of what grades your kids are getting.

[-] boonhet@sopuli.xyz 1 points 19 hours ago

Also for the love of God, set up an “observer” account in canvas or whatever your school uses. Have some knowledge of what grades your kids are getting.

I don't think that's even optional anymore in my country, it's been over a decade since I graduated high school and my mom had access starting early middle school. It's how teachers (usually the class teacher, not specific subject teachers) communicate with parents too, nobody wants to send emails or make phone calls.

[-] Grail@multiverse.soulism.net 9 points 1 day ago

Ask them how lunch was. Kids wanna talk about play, not maths.

[-] Shitbrains@lemmy.world 4 points 1 day ago

I only ever ask "what did you have for lunch" and both kids will say "don't remember" or "check on your phone"

[-] Grail@multiverse.soulism.net 5 points 1 day ago

The food is the most boring part of lunch! Ask them about what they played with their friends!

[-] Fleur_@aussie.zone 15 points 1 day ago

Teenage me is like 7 dimensions ahead of you. Would've just said "I don't know" for both. IMO you should talk yo your kids about things they want to talk with you about. I never liked taking about school but whenever mum and dad asked me about what I was thinkering with on my car I had a lot more to say

[-] boonhet@sopuli.xyz 3 points 19 hours ago

Well I guess there's just no "one size fits all" and you really need to know your own kid/teenager. The math class and favorite thing from parent comment serve as good examples to try with a younger kid, but over time you learn what your kid's like as a person (as the personality itself changes over time). I myself was hella bored with school and would've answered similarly. Of course my mom knew me well enough not to ask me questions I wouldn't answer anyway, or at least not very often.

[-] greenhorn@lemmy.world 11 points 1 day ago

I don't know if you meant "thinkering" but I like that word

[-] Fleur_@aussie.zone 2 points 20 hours ago

Its like tinkering but I was in school and drove a shitbox so a lot of the hobby was just figuring out how to make it start with no tools, no parts and only friends for help. I did a lot of push starts out of my school parking lot lol.

[-] andros_rex@lemmy.world 4 points 1 day ago

Parents should be invested in their child’s education. I blame my receding hairline on the fact that many are not.

I’m not saying parents need to go class by class or something, but school is such a big part of a kids life that they need to have at least a vague idea of what’s happening.

[-] SarahValentine@pawb.social 4 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago)

What you're describing is just interrogation, not participation. Take them to the library, get them a library card, help them find books that might interest them. Teach them everything you know, and about how to learn, why to learn, what good it'll all do them. That is being invested in your child's education.

[-] andros_rex@lemmy.world 0 points 14 hours ago

Today, a church came to my school and took pictures of children (brandishing bibles of course.)

If you were a parent, wouldn’t you want to hear about that?

“Interrogation” is in the way you ask. Being invested in your child’s education should include an awareness of what is happening at school. You should be demonstrating to children that their education is important and valuable.

[-] Fleur_@aussie.zone 1 points 20 hours ago

Its also besides the point when it comes to socialising with someone who doesn't want to talk about it

[-] Flatfire@lemmy.ca 15 points 1 day ago

Is direct parental oversight something schools allow these days? I know kids aren't always thrilled to present their parents with a report card, but that sounds like a totally different kind of nightmare. There's other ways to engage with your kids' learning struggles than a live dashboard of their assignment marks.

[-] andros_rex@lemmy.world 13 points 1 day ago

Yeah, many schools use some sort of online learning platform. Parents can access their kids grades and the assignments themselves at any time. Very useful for when little Jimmy has not turned in a single thing all year - “all of the assignments are available online, you can print out extra copies at home.”

I’ve just had too many parents expect me to reach out personally any time a kid doesn’t turn something in or starts failing. I’ve got ~100 kids, and two part time jobs on top of this - the live accountability should be sufficient for that.

[-] LostCarcosan@lemmy.today 2 points 1 day ago

That's absolutely horrendous. The idea of my mother having total access at any time to see everything I'm doing in school makes me ill. What a wonderful way to further empower abusive parents

this post was submitted on 28 Sep 2026
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