Reminds me of an old joke (I found it here, but I'm sure it's not the original)

There's an old Soviet joke: A man goes to a newspaper stand every day, buys a copy of Pravda, glances at the front cover, curses, and throws it away.

After a few weeks of this the seller just has to ask what's going on: "why do you always look at the cover but never inside?"

"I'm looking for an obituary."

"An obituary? But those are in the back!"

"Oh no, the obituary I'm looking for will be on the front page."

Point is, when he dies, you won't need to go online to see it.

The obituary will be so full of lies it will cause a short term increase in brain hemorrhages both nationally and internationally.