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Miss Rachel is metal, rules
(lemmy.nz)
cross-posted from: https://hexbear.net/post/9817394
Miss Rachel is metal
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this post was submitted on 18 Oct 2026
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You are faced with a dusted cheesy hilt of a magical sword and a mouthpiece of a wind-instrument
A green hat & ocarina sit on a shelf next to a pile of crusty socks & a picture of a blonde princess with pointy ears.
Outside the window of the mildewed room, you see a lake with another sultry wench. She is holding the blade of a sword.
Choose.
Look at sultry wench
The sultry wench meets your lustful gaze and throws the sword towards you. It sticks into a crusty picture of a large breasted demon, right between her boobs.
A donkey comes bursting into your room (ass first) and asks if you are okay. Seeing the blade, it turns it's donkey head towards you and asks if you are actually ready to venture further into the mouth of madness?
Do you follow the donkey? Or do you decide to invent bassoon?
Assure ass in the affirmative
The donkey affirmatively assures you in solidarity, crawling into bed with you.
Unfortunately, the donkey is rather large for a donkey and rolls over, causing you to asphyxiate.
You have suffocated by donkey. Evil overtakes the kingdom as your skeleton becomes a donkey's body pillow.
Load last save
Enter new name. 4 characters only. Choose a new class+, Steve Buscemi or Steve Martin.
Arse, Buscemi
You spring to life standing in the middle of a dark & damp pub, next to a friendly looking man who is offering you a towel.
He introduces himself as "Ford" and urges you to take the towel, meanwhile commenting on how you resemble Steve Buscemi.
Do you take the towel or reach into the pocket of your robe for some analgesics?
Take towel, sass that hoopy frood Ford Prefect
Ford sticks out an experienced thumb and after a somewhat messy pop sound you are both surrounded with a very brilliant & somewhat comfortable white light.
You are now standing inside a rather small refrigerator of a very Froody vessel.
Do you attempt to:
Open the refrigerator
Make a sandwich
Or
Take analgesic
Mmm ... Mmm ... Mmaster ... Is that you?