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equality rule
(lemmy.nz)
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this post was submitted on 27 Oct 2026
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This meme, while correct, demonstrates a misunderstanding of the argument.
"A man is not allowed to strike a woman, not even in self defense." We live in a society where some version of this is drilled into every male child's brain from a young age.
Nobody making this argument in good faith is gleefully responding to "equal rights for women" with "so I get to hit women", because the fuckheads who want to hit women aren't waiting for an excuse and are not mentally healthy.
Those who are making this argument in good faith could do with much better phrasing though. I prefer "Equal rights should include equal privilege." If self defense against a female asaultant is their only concern, then it sounds like they just want to hit women. There are other issues that can and should be addressed, like a man not being able to pick up their own child or nibling from school without dirty looks or potentially having the cops called on him.
Don't get me wrong, I understand perfectly well that in terms of privilege inequality, women have it worse. Women aren't taken seriously by their doctors, or by the law, or in most contexts really. Women get paid less to do the same work. If a woman pursues her dreams instead of getting married and having kids, that's sad. Women should not have to deal with any of this bullshit!
What I don't know is how to wrap this up with a concise tldr without sounding like a whiny moid.
You should always defend yourself with the minimum necessary force.
This. But it was drilled into me by my father to never ever under any circumstance to hit a woman. And I never have, even when she sexually assaulted me. It would have been justifiable for me to hit her to get her off of me, but I know deep in my being that she would have called the cops and I would have gone to jail for battery, and she would not have had to answer for the assault at all. I still don't really know what I should have done in that situation, but I do know that I should have not stayed married to her.
Sending warm and positive thoughts your way, you didn't deserve that. Hopefully you're far away from her now.
Thank you so much. I am safe now, as far away from her as I can be.
You have a point; there shouldn't be any excuse for assaulting somebody. The patriarchal standards hurt us all and make the world less safe.
Also, you're not a "moid." Fuck that word
Patriarchy is just king harem culture or horse herd dynamics applied to a society that no longer fits that dynamic.
Sorry I'm old as fuck, what is a "moid"?
If you smush "female android" together you get "femoid", and then removing the fe- you shorten it to "moid" for the male version.
It's obviously derogatory and it's meant to mean something akin to "someone with [all looks and] no brain".
I'm actually surprised Urban Dictionary doesn't have a better definition of femoid, but they do of moid.
The elephant in the room is 'why the fuck are we gendering robots'.
We gendered warships centuries ago. We love gendering things.
My thinking is that it originated from 4chan, and over there they also use the word "robot" derogatory. And the leap from "robot" to "android" isn't that far fetched.
Who knows, could also be inspired by Austin Powers' "fembots".
Fembots at least fit the joke. Austin Powers was a story of a misogynistic sex-hound from the 60s trying to make it in a (comparably) much more equitable world, and Dr. Evil, fully aware of Austin's weaknesses, used the fembots to deceive him.
Masterful joke.
Femoid is just fucking stupid.
So bimbo and himbo respectively?
Bimbo/himbo are about types of people with aesthetics and cultural signifiers. Moid/femoid are just slurs against men or women that a person of the opposite gender doesn't like
Yeah himbo doesn't really have the same bite. A lot of women even like a good himbo. I overall prefer a little intellectualism but I can go for a good himbo too. I've mostly heard it associated with Brendan fraisers roles in his youth (George of the jungle / the mummy) It gives golden retriever energy or one of those gym rats that's always telling the other dudes their muscles look great.
Patrick Warburton, particularly in voice acting roles. Kronk is peak himbo.
a moid is an asshole misogynistic male. The term stems from "femoid" which is a misogynistic term referring to women in general, usually said by moids who are also involuntarily celibate (incels).
I prefer to not call those people moids. The whole term is toxic and does more to reinforce gender roles than oppose it. It's not worth using at all.
I take no issue with calling toxic people toxic pejoratives. I'll use whatever term I think will offend the target the most, because fuckem.
My experience has been that language signifies specific attitudes, attracting people with those attitudes. The type of people that "moid" attracts are more likely to view men as not just cultural problematic or practically dangerous, but as people unworthy of equal respect. The thing about people who dehumanize a large social group like that is that they are usually willing to dehumanize people for other reasons, including people they simply dislike. Those sort are rarely fun to hang out with.
The people who use that term also tend to have more regular exposure to people with other awful attitudes. People who are casually transphobic, racist, and "edgy" in a way that goes beyond jokes. In short, 4chan/Twitter regulars who would rather expose themselves to hateful brainrot than hang out in "coddling safe spaces" that aren't astroterfed by Nazis.
Basically, toxic memes attract toxic people, and unlike pepe, there is no good buried under that term worth reclaiming. There are plenty of insults for shitty men that aren't just genderswapped misogyny.
You are a better person than I am.
I thank you for this knowledge.
I am disgusted to know it.
I apologize on behalf of my gender.
Don't apologize for things outside your control. As a species, we are still trying to outgrow the tribalism, aggression, and desire for dominance that helped our ancestors survive. Stand firm against the sophists, they exploit those old instincts rather than encourage us to rise above them.
You shouldn't have to apologize because other people in your demographic suck.
to expand on this, I used the term moid in my original comment because I could see how my entire argument could be oversimplified to "not all men are assholes", which is something moids say all the time when women complain about men.
They don't. They really don't. Comparisons that suggest they do don't compare "the same work" - they typically compare the median male and female total earnings which conceals a lot behind an assumption that men and women are identical aside from total pay. Once you start adjusting for things like role, industry, work hours, geography, seniority, etc the gap shrinks to nearly nothing and in some demographic cases (young, urban, single and childless for example) even flips the other way.
Complete bullshit. Women-dominated careers like teaching and social work are heavily undervalued while male-dominated ones are far better compensated, and women are still discriminated against in hiring.
What flips it back though is then going deeper and asking why women are contained to certain job titles (usually with less pay) also, women don't get paid equally in the work place when you consider any job that ever has an option for wage rises, because typically they never get them, or if they do they get a quarter of the rise against a man asking. They typically get passed over for promotions, over men, that counts as wage loss, they're not less qualified, just passed over because woman. They did a blind test on orchestra applicants, and hid them behind a curtain so the people hiring couldn't see gender, and then all of a sudden more women were being chosen, when previously that was not the case. Look at any male dominated industry (which typically has higher pay) and ask yourself why women aren't equally populated there. All of that counts. And more! I think there's like a set of steak knives too, or something.
Having seen that and considered it an inspiration, a public service department in Australia tried the same thing and then hit pause on it because it turned out that not being able to consider the gender of applicants led to fewer women being chosen which was the opposite of their goal: https://www.abc.net.au/news/2017-06-30/bilnd-recruitment-trial-to-improve-gender-equality-failing-study/8664888
There's multiple effects. Its mostly just life "choices"
having the capacity to get pregnant needs to be controlled for in those studies.
The CONSAD report (one of the more thorough ones done as far as considering and adjusting for various other influences that aren't simply sex discrimination but also aren't equal between the sexes) actually considered career interruption from having children to have one of the biggest impacts. Not working for weeks to months has long term effects regardless of cause, and one of the most common reasons for that happening for women is having a kid.
Women also tend to work less hours/week in general which was another huge impact (both because that's time being paid for, some of which is overtime, and also because it can influence future progression) - the standard of describing the "wage gap" in terms of total earnings rather than hourly earnings explicitly hides the effect of hours worked and I can't imagine that's by chance since it's a major factor.
Yes hence why ""choices""
i think my grandma put it quite simple: "never be the one to start punching people. but if you do get punched, make sure you hit them twice as hard".
she never cared about gender and never really even mentioned it. and that in a time, where gender roles where much stricter. she was the one that beat up a group of bullies, because she thought it was unfair how they treated others. played football with the boys, even though boys didnt want to kick balls with girls. but she just didn't take 'no' for an answer. to show them, she just got better than most of them.
even though ske knew there is a difference between boys and girls, she never mentioned it. IMO this, combined with her being an absolute badass, takes all the wind out of these petty arguments. "i cant hit a girl", "you better don't, last time she beat you up". or "i don't want to play with a girl", "understandable! she is simply better than you" etc.
No one says you can't hit a woman in self defense, besides very stupid people deliberately trying to portray themselves as victims.
Maybe not where you live but many cultures do teach that. Not fighting back when a man attacks you is a sign of cowardice and weakness. Fighting back when woman attacks you is a sing of cowardice and weakness. If you never heard that you live under a rock.
That's what my dad told me. However, he was a very stupid person who deliberately tried to portray himself as a victim, so I guess your point still stands.
I've witnessed many instances of exactly that being celebrated. "How can she slap?" is great example.