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Holidays are going to be fun
(lemmy.nz)
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this post was submitted on 05 Nov 2026
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Right? When my extended family gets together there are like 40 of us. I might try to avoid the ones that are MAGA, or at least avoid talking politics with them, but I’m not gonna refuse to go to Christmas or Thanksgiving just because my chuddy uncle is going to be there. I’ll just take a walk with the other queer cousins and get a little toasted before dinner
I would, were I you, use that time to hold them accountable for their politics of hate. I see that as the morally correct action.
Nor would I, in most cases. Were the celebration with mostly MAGA family, I would consider not attending.
Must be nice for only some of them to be MAGA.
When they're all MAGA, though, sometimes it's best to just not go.
Aww the cousin walk <3
My family extended to just 1st cousins is more than 80 people. Every single last one full maga Christo-fascists. Not worth being around.
Do you do the same thing with the ones that are child molesters? What you're describing is identical to why most child molesters are family members and the molestation is actually known about.
Of course not? What kind of question is that? Being a child molester and being a conservative are two wildly different things
One fucks children the other just supports people that fuck children.
Correct, one molests children and the other protects child molestors. Only sometimes are they one and the same.
Edit: Imagine downvoting this, you people are excrutiatingly forgiving of the people who would just as easily see you in chains.
What you describe about making nice with them even though they are arguably awful people is absolutely no different. Fucking hold them accountable. Tell them get their racist fucking asses out of your home. Tell them to fuck off and die mad. Quit enabling them. Your "logic" is exactly why most child molesters are family members and family friends.
Look, I’m no fan of conservatives, but you have to recognize that someone molesting children is very very different from someone holding conservative politics.
Do you really expect me to go through life shouting at and refusing to speak with anyone with politics to the right of mine? Life is full of compromises and picking your battles. I would absolutely refuse to be in the same room with a pedophile relative, because that’s a big deal worth fighting over. My aunt who thinks ivermectin works? Not worth the trouble.
Most people, even repeat Trump voters, are pretty tuned out of politics. So I don’t feel like it’s my solemn duty to grill everyone over their voting patterns, assume their vote defines them as a person, and only associate with the purest of heart.
I'm not talking about them. I'm talking about you needing to hold them accountable. In that, there is zero difference.
I expect you to hold people accountable; especially family members. That actually starts with speaking with them and not avoiding the politics because that makes you both feel uncomfortable. However, when they decide that they are racist then, yeah, tell them to grow up or fuck off and die. Quit enabling them.
Then tune them the fuck in. Quit letting the skate by playing nice with them at holiday dinners. Fuck holiday dinners; holding them accountable is far more important.
I admire your passion, but I disagree that it’s my responsibility to hold others accountable for their politics just because we’re related and going to the same dinner. I’m responsible for my own beliefs, and if I want to spend time trying to win people over to my side, that’s well and good. But there’s a time and a place for that, and I don’t think holiday meals are it. Purely from a strategic standpoint, I don’t think confronting someone over Thanksgiving dinner is going to win them, or anyone else in the room, to my side.
From a purely strategic standpoint the people like you in my family are seen as having chose the fascists over their queer family members, IJS. I don't know how "bad" your family is, but I cut off my dad after he told me "n words are taking all the welfare" and I don't talk to anyone who take his side on that issue. I've been called all manner of immature for that decision by people like you. But my dad is a racist chud, still is.
If they never face social consequences for being terrible people with terrible views they'll never change. You're helping to reinforce the idea that they're right in their beliefs, because they get no consequences for them. It is everyone's responsibility to hold our anti-social members accountable otherwise we end up with a hostile and anti-social society. Like we have. Because these people aren't being held accountable. So yes, to some degree it's absolutely your responsibility. But getting along is easier and doesn't require any difficulty or sacrifice on your part. MAGA is bad but so it's the quiet third that doesn't push back on MAGAts to keep the peace. Collaborators more or less. It's all the same to the people in MAGAs crosshairs.
Thank you. I appreciate that we can have a conversation.
Why wouldn't it be your responsibility? It's my responsibility, too, but as someone closer to them it seems you bear an even larger burden. It's part of being in a society.
Not if that is the only time it ever happens. Even then, it is better than doing nothing and let them go merrily along making the lives of everyone around them a little bit worse.
You guys seem to be discussing, while having very strong opinions. I'm going to remove the comments about the trolling. Don't go after the users, go after the argument.
Stop calling them a troll, this is a warning before a day break. Go after the argument, not the user. They're discussing further in.
Well now that you mention it there was that one great Uncle. Never knew the full details, but yeah kinda the same deal. Just came with the extended family.