this post was submitted on 28 Nov 2024
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Science Memes

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[–] NutWrench@lemmy.ml 30 points 3 days ago (1 children)

"So what about the fossil record?"

"Dude. God put fossils in the ground to test our faith."

"No. I think God put YOU here to test MY faith."

[–] funkforager@sh.itjust.works 1 points 3 days ago

RIP Bill Hicks

[–] setsneedtofeed@lemmy.world 129 points 4 days ago* (last edited 4 days ago) (5 children)

Brevity is the soul of wit.

[–] gofsckyourself@lemmy.world 55 points 4 days ago (1 children)

That's a different joke, now.

[–] poke@sh.itjust.works 60 points 4 days ago

Also removes the joke of the kid having more complex thoughts.

[–] sukhmel@programming.dev 4 points 3 days ago

Me? Me, specifically‽ He cared, it's so sweet ❤️

[–] FiskFisk33@startrek.website 20 points 4 days ago

"your joke but worse"

[–] RizzRustbolt@lemmy.world 23 points 4 days ago

But now it's not a sendup of the Watchmaker's Paradox.

[–] infinite_ass@leminal.space 6 points 4 days ago* (last edited 4 days ago)

Thanks. It was indeed absurdly verbose. These clowns who downvote you suffer from 2 tinfoil ears.

[–] meep_launcher@lemm.ee 18 points 3 days ago (2 children)

I mean, have you read the tenets of Satanism? Pretty darn convincing. Call me a devil's advocate.

[–] Tuxman@sh.itjust.works 10 points 3 days ago

I think you first need to pass the Satanic bar exam to call yourself a devil’s advocate

[–] Dyskolos@lemmy.zip 7 points 3 days ago (1 children)

The difference when a cult grounds on logic and reasoning instead of on an ancient high-fantasy-book which makes no sense from beginning to end. But was probably a cool read some centuries ago. Still, admittedly, the greatest way to control the sheeples and keep them in line.

If I'd be forced at gunpoint to choose a religion, I'd pick them. Or buddhists.

[–] fossilesque@mander.xyz 7 points 3 days ago (1 children)

Buddhists get a little murdery sometimes too.

[–] Dyskolos@lemmy.zip 7 points 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago)

I know, i know. But of all the misogynistic, supressive silly retrograde murder-cults, those are the least misogynistic, supressive silly retrograde murder-cults. At least they have some actual wisdom to share, not stories about a whole incest-species with a base-gene-pool of an estimated two people of which one even was made out of the first one.

Long story short: Yes. Fuck them too. Just a lil less.

[–] morrowind@lemmy.ml 31 points 4 days ago (2 children)

Do cows not match their 4 billion year chain of evolution?

[–] WraithGear@lemmy.world 28 points 4 days ago (1 children)

They do! But the Christian argument is that Satan tied them into his plot to trick people as well.

[–] Kolanaki@yiffit.net 50 points 4 days ago (2 children)

Satan's plan sounds awesome. They won't even tell me what God's plan is. Just that he has one. Does he have a plan? Or does he just have the concept of one? 🤔

[–] WraithGear@lemmy.world 16 points 4 days ago (1 children)

I don’t know, i read the Bible. Those stories aren’t the flex god thinks they are.

[–] Benjaben@lemmy.world 4 points 4 days ago

Pshaw, let's see you or your deity turn someone into a pillar of salt for looking the wrong way, fuck yeah Team God!

[–] Swedneck@discuss.tchncs.de 8 points 4 days ago (1 children)

honestly when you read the bible god is pretty relatable, he's kinda just proud of having literally created everything (including evil, isaiah 45:7) and wants to be worshipped for it, and gets angry when you don't worship him for having literally created everything by himself.
It all makes more sense when you drop the idea that god is arbitrarily perfect and good.

I can't say i'd do better with absolute power of creation and having to literally create the concept of existence on my own. If we're created in the image of god then frankly it's a wonder we're as friendly as we are.

[–] WhatYouNeed@lemmy.world 3 points 3 days ago (1 children)
[–] Swedneck@discuss.tchncs.de 4 points 3 days ago

yeah that's honestly pretty close to how i feel god must be if he's real, why would he consider us anything other than entertainment? why would he care particularly much about us?

[–] MonkderVierte@lemmy.ml 10 points 4 days ago* (last edited 4 days ago) (1 children)

Not the cows humanity fiddled with.

[–] SatansMaggotyCumFart@lemmy.world 6 points 3 days ago (1 children)

They promised they wouldn't say anything.

[–] Flocklesscrow@lemm.ee 3 points 3 days ago

So this is why the Devil went down to Georgia?

[–] flambonkscious@sh.itjust.works 6 points 3 days ago (1 children)

I might be missing something here but how do we know precisely what 4bil. years of random mutations looks like?

[–] SatansMaggotyCumFart@lemmy.world 8 points 3 days ago (1 children)
[–] Dyskolos@lemmy.zip 5 points 3 days ago

Your nick is pure poetry. I stand here in admiration.

[–] SurfinBird@lemmy.ca 11 points 4 days ago (1 children)
[–] BobbyNevada@discuss.tchncs.de 12 points 4 days ago

Hail Satan!

[–] gofsckyourself@lemmy.world 9 points 4 days ago (1 children)
[–] DaPorkchop_@lemmy.ml 8 points 4 days ago

needs more jpeg

[–] jabathekek@sopuli.xyz 9 points 4 days ago
[–] midnight_puker@sh.itjust.works 7 points 4 days ago (1 children)
[–] Juliana@sopuli.xyz 3 points 4 days ago

Wow 😳😳...