this post was submitted on 21 Feb 2025
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Greentext

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This is a place to share greentexts and witness the confounding life of Anon. If you're new to the Greentext community, think of it as a sort of zoo with Anon as the main attraction.

Be warned:

If you find yourself getting angry (or god forbid, agreeing) with something Anon has said, you might be doing it wrong.

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[–] P1k1e@lemmy.world 63 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Don't forget the rampant domestic abuse that frequently came from the person you signd a life long contract with. Easy my ass

[–] Jax@sh.itjust.works 5 points 20 hours ago (1 children)

Why would any of that context matter to a 4channer?

[–] P1k1e@lemmy.world 2 points 11 hours ago

Yaknow, when your right, your right

[–] hansolo@lemm.ee 47 points 1 day ago

Lol, poor Anon thinks a Silent Generation meetcute in a cartoon is Boomers IRL.

Awwww....

[–] Krauerking@lemy.lol 42 points 1 day ago

My grandparents got married because my grandfather left his car keys in his coat on the rack by the door of a diner and someone grabbed his coat.

Apparently while they waited in the diner for a friend to pick them up he asked my grandmother if they should get married and she said
"Sure."
3rd date. It was just something to do back then.

[–] Trex202@lemmy.world 40 points 1 day ago (1 children)

101 Dalmatians came out in 1961, these characters would be a part of the Silent Gen, or the Greatest Gen.

[–] Zorsith@lemmy.blahaj.zone 8 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Fuck, is it really that old? Crazy

[–] kandoh@reddthat.com 7 points 23 hours ago

Still looks amazing

[–] Hikermick@lemmy.world 48 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Premarital sex being taboo sped things up

[–] ALoafOfBread@lemmy.ml 20 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago) (1 children)

And yet they had more premarital sex than millenials/gen z

Edit: can't find the source where I had heard that. Maybe not true. This study shows the rates are lower than for millennials, but close. https://www.bgsu.edu/ncfmr/resources/data/family-profiles/hemez-nonmarital-sex-by-age-25-boomers-millennials-fp-17-11.html

[–] Hikermick@lemmy.world 7 points 1 day ago (1 children)

I was just making a joke, but don't doubt that you're right. It's a tough thing to measure as people aren't always honest. Like if somebody took a poll in 1986 asking folks if they smoked weed, paranoia might cause smokers to say no

[–] ALoafOfBread@lemmy.ml 8 points 1 day ago

Oh, totally. Just like to bring up that our grandparents/great grandparents were getting nasty even before widespread use of birth control, etc. Young folks today are having a lot less sex, or so I've heard, largely due to difficulties finding partners, stress, etc.

[–] sugar_in_your_tea@sh.itjust.works 33 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Not a boomer, but here's how it worked for me:

  1. Meet at party, hit it off, and exchange numbers
  2. Text for a few days
  3. Date for a couple months
  4. Due to cruelties of hard to change plans, date long distance for a year
  5. Get married

Still together after 10+ years. We're not all that different from the cartoon, and if we didn't have the forced separation, we probably would've gotten married sooner.

[–] lka1988@sh.itjust.works 7 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago) (2 children)

That's basically how my wife and I met. Except we were never exclusive because she was a really good friend and I didn't wanna fuck that up. We ended up going our separate ways when she went off to college... We reconnected platonically years later, and then realized we were both getting divorced at the same time. One thing led to another, and we've been married for almost 2 years now.

We joke that if we had been exclusive, we would have a 20 year old already.

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[–] dwindling7373@feddit.it 70 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago) (2 children)

1 - they are dog people. They probably married just because the dogs liked each others.

2 - it's a cartoon.

3 - it's just a fucking depiction of two people randomly meeting, it's implied that they hit it off stellarly and, yes, people do MAD CRAZY things such as... marrying a person they are in love with.

4 - bestiality.

[–] tetris11@lemmy.ml 32 points 1 day ago (1 children)

One of these is not like the other. My bet is number 2.

[–] ZombiFrancis@sh.itjust.works 3 points 23 hours ago

I dunno, 3 makes wild accusations about implied meanings. Seems suspect.

[–] Ummdustry@sh.itjust.works 7 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago)

/\ /\
(4._.4)

[–] trxxruraxvr@lemmy.world 151 points 1 day ago (3 children)

Everyone knows Disney's movies are 100% accurate depictions of reality

[–] prole@lemmy.blahaj.zone 15 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Treasure Planet was a documentary.

[–] someguy3@lemmy.world 3 points 1 day ago

Oh that's why Musk wants to go to space.

[–] Onionguy@lemm.ee 9 points 1 day ago

You may be sarcastic but too many ppl actually believe this.

[–] amon@lemmy.world 22 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Ik right, Mickey Mouse exists irl

[–] gens@programming.dev 27 points 1 day ago

I'v seen him DJ

[–] tetris11@lemmy.ml 52 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago) (2 children)

Conan O'Brian meeting his wife:

https://people.com/tv/who-is-conan-obrien-liza-powel-obrien-wife/

"Then I left the room after this 20-minute conversation with only her. " After joking about having kids together during this initial conversation, the two exchanged information and began dating. In January 2002, the couple tied the knot.

So it happens, it just helps if you're tall and ginger.

[–] Superheavy@lemmy.world 40 points 1 day ago (6 children)

Step 1) don't be ugly

Step 2) see step 1

[–] RowRowRowYourBot@sh.itjust.works 15 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Be affable

Be interesting

Be presentable

No one dreams about the guy they have to apologize for after you met them

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[–] LouNeko@lemmy.world 19 points 1 day ago

Exception to Rule 1: Be Conan Fucking O'Brian

[–] Damage@feddit.it 14 points 1 day ago (4 children)

I mean, Conan O'Brien isn't exactly beautiful

[–] criitz@reddthat.com 15 points 1 day ago
[–] tetris11@lemmy.ml 12 points 1 day ago
[–] Empricorn@feddit.nl 9 points 1 day ago

I mean, I would have his babies, and I'm a straight man!

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[–] Simulation6@sopuli.xyz 8 points 1 day ago (1 children)

For men:

  1. Be rich
  2. Don't be poor

No, you just have to be interesting to talk to, genial, and not look like complete shit.

[–] notabot@lemm.ee 8 points 1 day ago

"Don't be ugly" is definitely helpful physically, but vital intelectually and emotionally.

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[–] mindbleach@sh.itjust.works 2 points 23 hours ago

Alan Alda famously met his wife at a party, where someone dropped a cake on the floor. He and she were the only two who didn't hesitate to scoop some up anyway.

[–] Boomkop3@reddthat.com 57 points 1 day ago

They did not. And even then, so darn many boomers think it's normal to dispise your partner you'd almost think they're a bunch of losers

[–] kandoh@reddthat.com 15 points 1 day ago

Why would you ever want to meet someone and get married so quickly? Are you more interested in the appearance of what you consider to be a successful life, rather than having a life partner?

[–] badbytes@lemmy.world 5 points 23 hours ago

Didn't even have smartphones either.

[–] Fizz 7 points 1 day ago

Anon needs to start crashing into women at the park

[–] JoShmoe@ani.social 21 points 1 day ago (1 children)

My former boss had a whole church community arrange a meeting between him and a woman, just so his parents could tell her parents what he thought of her. The two would eventually marry. It really was that easy back then. And yes they’re still happily married for reasons beyond my understanding.

[–] ddash@lemmy.dbzer0.com 17 points 1 day ago (10 children)

I'm going to assume if you arrange 1000 marriages a few are definitely bound to work out. For the rest though...

[–] RowRowRowYourBot@sh.itjust.works 13 points 1 day ago (2 children)

Arranged marriages have better results than love based ones in many cultures. It turns out having all your family who have had kids and been married have a clearer understanding of the couples compatibility than those in love.

Love will make you overlook the thing that your auntie would zero in on as a long term problem.

[–] wizardbeard@lemmy.dbzer0.com 5 points 1 day ago (1 children)

I can see the logic. The realities of day to day life and managing a household together are a considerably larger presence than most people realize until they're shoulder deep into adult life.

My cousin was miserable after his first year in marriage. Our grandmother, who was lovely but not perceptive, told him not to marry her after meeting her the first time because she was dismissive of his perspective. My cousin didn’t think this was an issue until the honeymoon period wore off and then realized his new wife never thought he knew anything.

They lasted 6 years.

[–] sortaPasswordName@lemmy.zip 3 points 1 day ago

For context, see research by Myers, D., 1993 (which I can't find a link to at the moment) about differences in satisfaction in couples in India in arranged marriages and couples in Amerikkka in marriages of choice, and compare it with the later research Myers, 2005.

More specifically to your statement about auntie zeroing in on something, see MacDonald & Ross, 1999.

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[–] adarza@lemmy.ca 15 points 1 day ago

the dog kinda roped 'em in to it.

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