I don't have kids but I still like to wonder about where planes are going
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Other Comic Communities of Interest
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where planes are going
Another one that's not corporate, and doesn't remove planes when someone pays a fee.
ADSB exchange is the go-to
Now is my chance to share a useless fun fact! If there is a V-22 Osprey on the map the icon will change from helicopter mode to plane mode depending on airspeed
This is also my preferred flight tracker. It's important to understand how and why this site is available for free, and where the data come from:
- the FAA and others mandate that pretty much all aircraft broadcast ADS-B info automatically on every flight. ADS-B is an international standard for aircraft data to be broadcast for the purpose of conspicuous ID, locating, and other info about the craft. Only highly sensitive military flights are exempt, for obvious reasons.
- This particular site merely aggregates data from volunteers who have set up stations. These stations are easy enough to set up that there are enough volunteers to provide continuous, overlapping coverage in most places. If you wanted, you could set up a station of your own (requires just a cheap ~$30USD SDR, an antenna, and a laptop/raspberry pi/etc)
Some people get easy babys.
And then there are the people who get to be parents of ever-screaming high energy high need children.
Then there are the ones who have an easy baby, wonder what all the fuss is about, and then have a second which is a nightmare. Actual quote from friends of ours who had it that way round - "I understand what you were on about now."
I knew a couple that had four super easy babies in a row. Just delightful, sleeping through the night within a month of birth, no colic, easy like Sunday morning girls. So they went for one more. Had a boy that was the hardest baby in the world. Didnβt sleep through the night till 5, colic, had a nuclear reactors worth of energy in him. They said if that had been their first they never would have had a second.
You never know what youβre going to get. My daughter was ROUGH the first 9 months, hardest thing Iβve ever been through. But then it got a lot easier and every day was better. Sheβs 15 now and the coolest kid. We had planned to have a second but by the time we could even wrap our heads around it she could talk, so we asked her if she wanted a sibling. She thought about her two best friends, who are brother and sister and fought like mad, and said nah. I didnβt want to go through that first 9 months again so that was that. Really glad we did that, weβve got such a great bond with the three of us.
Crazy to think someone would actually go "4 isn't enough, let's go for 5".
Itβs like playing Russian roulette without spinning the chamber.
Iβve pulled the trigger 4 times already, I must just be lucky so letβs keep pulling that trigger!
This was my mom. I luckily had my easy babies after the more screamy one, but my mom had 3 kids, said she was always so judgemental of parents with kids throwing tantrums in the store, she knew she was doing something right because we didn't do that, and in her words:
"For my hubris, God sent me Janet "
And she figured out that there are kids who scream in the store no matter what you do.
I know Lemmy is aggressively anti-child for some reason, but parenting was by far the best work I have ever done. Kids are work but such delightful little people.
Also my mom - I didn't remember her being affectionate with us, she did a good job of clothing, feeding, educating us but wasn't ever really, I dunno, Mom - like? I asked her about it once and she said "I don't like little kids " and I was like WTF you had so many kids! And she said "well I like you all NOW, I knew you would grow up and become people."
This happened to my family. Our first was all around pretty easy. Our second was absolutely insane. She gave my wife and I PTSD; we felt like abuse victims. She screamed 90% of her whole existence until she was 2. Any noise above a whisper would wake her up. This kid would break all parents. We tried everything to make it easier and literally nothing worked. She is the most intense child I've ever met, and she is cute as all hell. Love her to death, but my god is she difficult and stubborn.
We started watching TV with headphones because we were so scared of waking her up during nap time. Screamed for hours if she woke up, nothing could fix it.
That's why I'm pro abortion. But not after the child's 10th year. That would be unethical.
There is both how easy is the kid and how much support there is around (not just from family and friends but also institutional). And then there is how fulfilling you personally find being βparentβ. Honestly, it took me more than I would have wanted to find a parent-other life balance. And I still find the parent life to be a bit limiting at times. While I have friends that dove head first into the parent life apparently seamlessly.
One must understand that the hormones which motivate breeding instinct in social mammals override all other considerations on a neurochemical level when someone has a baby--if those hormones and emotional systems are working correctly.
(Sometimes they aren't, after all; everyone knows those statistical outlier individuals who stick out like a sore thumb for having no parental instincts.)
If a common-sense-overriding mechanism were not in place to drive reproduction, a species will go extinct.
It's exactly the inability (more like refusal) of most of us to override our base instincts that is going to cause the extinction of not just ourselves, but most complex life on the planet along with us. I say that not just as someone with "no parental instincts," but rather a humble human who actually uses the ability to see further than my nose.
I didn't really want kids, but my wife did, so we compromised and had 6.
Jokes aside I found it super fulfilling, I had struggled a lot with depression and feeling like everything was pointless, but raising kids gives me a purpose and makes mudane stuff like work feel meaningful. I definitely get what the comic is talking about, it's rough a lot of the time, but it was what I unexpectedly needed in my life.
6???
Yep, 6. After you have several it's kinda like "how much harder could it be to have another?"
Humans were never meant to take care of babies as couples or alone.
Research suggests that given the tradeoffs of our evolutionary path, we had to shift towards a collective parenting (call it tribe, clan, extended family, etc.)
The modern "individualization" of the person is what has convinced us that such parenting form is "normal" and bearable, and that if you feel overwhelmed, there is something wrong with you.
Parent of 1.5y here.
Without grandparents in picture I would go crazy.
Doesn't Ruth know you can reuse the same glass instead of getting a new glass every time you want more wine
Yeah, but that makes it much more difficult for the artist to show you shes drunk.
Father for 12 years here, never have I ever said anything even remotely close of this sort to any my non kids / single friends, is it an American thing?
American father here. Not as far as I know. I tell folks don't have kids unless you're 100% sure. Even then, get a pet first. I love my kid. But boy, do I sure believe folks should get all sorts of tests before they decide now.
Kids are hard man, especially if you didn't have a good example growing up.
it helps to be enslaved to a system that forces you to spend an average of 8 hours a day working only to be classified as part time while getting no health benefits whatsoever despite there being essentially no government healthcare
*I'm including excessive commute and non-paid work as "working"
Honestly as a father I agree that being a parent is the hardest thing I've done in my life but, I'm also so fucking tired of the "it's hell" joke.
My older dughter is now a teenager with all the trouble that entails and the selfishness she has but still there are no words to describe how much she helps when needed, how hard of a pilar she is to me, how caring and loving she is....
Oh wait there is one...
Family
I absolutely adore my kiddo and find meaning in my role as a dad that I did in very few other things I've done in life.
That said, it definitely does change your life in a way where you will not be able to prioritize the things that are just for you anymore. I am both deeply happy to have become a parent and simultaneously very glad that my wife and I waited and got our finances in order and traveled and lived our life as a couple for almost a decade before we decided to be parents. For parents whose story wasn't quite as deliberate, I can imagine a lot of conflicting feelings.
Nuclear families are intentionally isolating because it makes women and children more vulnerable.
It really does take a village and we need to get back into living with big extended families.
I would recommend reading the Baby decision to people. It's a very open minded examination, despite what the title might implicate also very open and supportive for childless/childfree mindset. Even touches topics like, just because you like kids, doesn't mean you have to have them, you can teach, volunteer for after school activities, etc.
I think the single most important take away from it is that whether you decide to have kid(s) or not, you give something up.
You also have to go into it responsibly and it's also okay to reevaluate as you go along, e.g. just because you wanted 3 kids before getting married, doesn't mean you can't take a moment to reevaluate after the first if you still want that.
Meh, thereβs enough of a biological drive to have children thereβs no need to pressure people into it socially. Itβs condescending to assume someone else will follow your same βgrowthβ trajectory.
evolution has given us a drive to have sex sure enough.
but my impression is that there's not a lot of biological drive to have children per se, as shown by a lack of children the moment that women can actually decide whether to have them.
About to be 43 and more grateful every year that my partner and I are childfree. I like hanging out with my friend's kids occasionally, they can be funny tiny humans, but I hit a limit quickly and we invariably share a sigh of relief once we're in the car on our way home.
I'm also grateful that there are folks who love kids and are great, involved parents to them. I'm in awe of my friend's ability to be the mom she is and I appreciate her efforts to better the collective group of humanity by two. Even more grateful that I was free to make a different choice. It takes all kinds, ya know? And kids benefit from unofficial "aunties", I think.
Naw, kids are great fun
I like kids but I do not want my own.
I think people should be OK with other people making their own choices.
Telling someone to "grow up and have kids" like in the comic is really shitty just like how telling someone they made a mistake by having kids would be.
Idk why the argument is "everyone should have kids or nobody should have kids. "
I feel like the internet has ruined many people's tolerance for ambiguity or difference.
when I see a cute baby smile at me, its like a sims moodlet. "I need one of those. Why dont I have one of those". After 24 ish hours I remember babysitting and caring for my sibling and cousin, and quickly go back to normal. 30 and childless.
I feel like this cartoon was drawn by someone who doesn't have kids. Or didn't want them but got them.
Be fulfilled without kids or with them. Don't be fulfilled by judging those who have chosen different from you.
Offtopic, but after reading these comments, I'm so glad I first opened Lemmy today rather than Reddit. Thoughtful, varied discussion, instead of sifting through a ton of samey "joke" comments to maybe (if ever) find some nugget of humanistic or original thought, or get bored, doomscrolling and lose hope in humanity.
I just love this community, thank you all for being here.
No shit. Raising kids is an act of love and sacrifice.
If you aren't willing to do this, do NOT have kids!
I would be absolutely destroyed if I had dumb little copy of me that I was required to take care of.
I understand now why my dad was so distant and eventually went away.
Having an insane mother helps, too.
