Start trying to figure out the best way to give away most of it.

Probably cry from confusion as to how I became a billionaire??

Trying to figure out how to tax them so I won’t get in trouble.

OR I’ll go to some remote island.

Get them breakfast?

I am so boring I would stick it in my savings account and live off the interest.

OR take a few million and sponsor a Formula 1 team with a made up name and travel with the team for a year.

Ask them why they won’t give their money to those in need?

I don’t know. I’m just surprised no one else read this sentence as though they were waking up some billionaire from their slumber.

Dunno, maybe hate on poor people?

Buy a house and car for every one of my family members. After that I'd set aside a few million to live off the interest and spend the rest on actually fixing problems billionaires and the government refuse to do. Make a robust food distribution system that drastically reduces hunger in the world, build cheap affordable housing in rich people's neighborhoods, buy out land for the express purpose of installing a proper rail system across the state of California, that sort of thing.

Become Batman and use my wealth to hunt my new peers.

Use my newly found influence in politics to make sure my kind cannot exist ever again.

Buy Argentina.

Find everyone in my life who has money issues and give them each a million.

Get rid of it, that much money is toxic. I’d throw it at every good cause I could, buy a modest house, and get back to being broke as soon as I could.

Host an anonymous scholarship program for 800 million to throw the money away while giving education opportunities to people in poverty, donate 100 mil to open source projects I use. invest 90 mil to have a steady income throughout the rest of my life.

I can live a satisfying life just with 10 mil, and the income generated from investments would be a good safety net, but I'm not really a high end luxury seeker.

Tell him to go back to sleep before he can start up any more damage

Besides paying off my debt and repairing my house as well as installing a geothermal heat pump, set up investments, basically all the normal shit one would do if they suddenly got a large windfall?

Buy up land to turn into forests, figure out a way to set it up in trusts or something such that nobody will have the right to do a full clear cut for timber any time soon, but maintenance cuts are fine.

Set up about a gigawatt worth of wind power generation in my country if the billions are multiple rather than exactly a billion euros or dollars or whatever. Our power usage peaks at around 1.6 gigawatts in the winter. Wind's unpredictable and I don't expect it to completely fill all demand, but rather make electricity so cheap that the fossil plants wouldn't turn a profit most of the time. Solar would be nice too, but it's borderline useless for about 2-4 months a year, I've forgotten the exact numbers.

Can't change the world with a few billion, but could noticeably improve one particular corner of it - and one that has a particularly dirty power grid at that. Driving an EV is STILL as bad as an ICE here because in the winter our electricity comes not from something as beautifully clean as coal or gas, but fucking shale rock...

Bonus, not only would I improve the availability of cheap green power, our government is currently partially funding heating system conversions from SFHs in cities and small towns, to replace solid fuel furnaces with heat pumps (ideally) or at least newer, cleaner burning furnaces, with the goal of improving air quality. Meaning the government would essentially be helping people make the most of the cheaper and greener electricity.

Give most of it away to free software foundation and put couple million to an low yield ethical index fund and start packing for some traveling.

Nothing.

Make friends with Luigi.

1. Hire an accountant. I assume I've entered some sort of tax hell for this, especially as a US citizen living overseas.
2. pay off my house
3. pay off US student loans since I assume there would be no way out of that
4. send my wife to driving camp (she doesn't have her license which is a liability out here) which costs > 300k JPY
5. set up for our retirement. We have no kids to help us, so we need to have good investments in planning
6. put ~50 million into other investments, savings, etc.
7. replace my car with an electric vehicle
8. get a new tractor for my farm
9. build out the workshop with proper tools
10. take care of the needs of any immediate family making sure to pay off any loans they have
11. start looking at causes to set up donations with the goal of donating most of the money

Get health insurance, a good one

Think really really hard if I'm going to work or not. I'd probably go just for the pleasure of being there with a smile and the biggest "I don't give a fuck" attitude ever.

Quit my job

Call a fiduciary firm in LA and have them start The Sovereign Fund for Humanity's Poor, and promptly deposit all but $10,000,000 into that. I would hire 5 people to run it. Three fiduciary's and two data analysts. The fiduciary's must be from different financial centers, the data analysts must be from Oxfam. The purpose of the fund will be to use the ROI to create trusts for the poorest people in the world first. I'd basically be privatizing UBI in about 500 years.

help SO many people. I'd build homeless shelters etc. I always had the dream of building a whole shitload of apartments, and offering them on a sliding scale, or free if homeless. Hell, I'd be a billionaire. I'd probably just offer thme free anyway

Probably wake up.

If I woke up as a billionaire tomorrow I'd probably sleep in.

First thing? I'd go and fill the car up. Probably pay for a few other people's petrol while I'm there.

(Public transport is good, delayed government projects to implement it are not, actually fuck it I'll go fund the train line myself )