No longer asking if he can haz
this post was submitted on 25 Jul 2026
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Is everyone who got this considered old or am I still ok?
Yes.
You're probably old-ish (late 30s to early 50s maybe?), and you're absolutely still ok (in this way at least, maybe not your joints or gut though).
Beans did not steal anything. The chicken always belonged to Beans, though you were unaware of that basic fact.
1/10, OP is clearly trying to cash in on the bean craze without giving us any beans.
I gave you the ultimate bean, and this is how you repay me? https://lemmy.world/post/49897652
Betrayal and abeandonment from your own
With rotisserie chicken, friendship ends!!! 😡
Beans knows what beans wants and is self actualizing. How many of your goals have you achieved today?
If my cat did this, I'd just be so impressed I'd let her have the damn chicken. Enjoy the conquest and all.
When I was a little girl, I had a black cat. We lived on the 9th floor. One day the window was open and a pigeon landed on the ledge outside. My cat lunged at it, and thankfully I was there and grabbed her by her rear end.
I was able to pull her back in, the pigeon still in her clutches. She ran to the bathroom and hid behind the toilet with the bird in her mouth.
She growled and made absolutely insane noises at us as we tried to get her out and save the bird.
Eventually, we got her to let go. Sadly, the bird died. We never kept that window open again, and I learned that day that Margo was a freaking ruthless hunter.
All of them are. They devastate ecosystems if they're let outside, that's one of the reasons they tell you to keep them indoors. They kill an astronomical amount of wildlife.
I wouldn’t say all of them. My parents’ last cats… well, one got chased all over the house by a squirrel, and once lost a fight with a mouse. The other made friends with the birds that landed on the roof.
I'm sure there are adorable exceptions like that :)
Honestly I’m impressed your cat managed to kill a bird while still technically being an inside cat. That takes a special intersection of luck and skill.
Kill a bird while being on the 9th floor… that is a whole lot of luck and skill, I agree.
I’m not gonna lie, I was a bit traumatized by the whole situation but my mom did a great job explaining that I did my best and prevented the cat from jumping to her death while hunting the damn pigeon.
Except it sets a precedent that they can steal your food.
I mean it obviously can
That's why you fill up the bathtub while he's eating.
Chicken bones are dangerous (can be deadly) for animals as they splinter. If my cats steal some cheese I'll let them have it (if it's not too big as they are lactose intolerant). But now it's hard to have a cheese platter. They just keep trying until there's a weak moment in our surveillance. They are cheese ninjas.
cooked ones, yes
Cooked chicken bones are super dangerous. They’d likely kill your cat.
They're not really that bad. The bones get soft and kinda crumbly when they're cooked in the chicken. They only get brittle when they're allowed to dry after the meat is stripped off. The whole "shards of bone will pierce their stomach/intestines" idea is kind of a myth. They're still a choking hazard, but that's true for any bones, cooked or not.
I'm sure I'll get a few people who want to link some blog that says otherwise, but that's what the emergency vets told me the first time my dog ate fried chicken.
Beans was 9 pounds, now he's 11 pounds..
why are brains so similar? This was my first thought and sure enough, comment #2
Give him a day or two. A pound and a half of those are transitory
Good kitty :3
Your display name suggests that you may be biased in matters of feline goodness.
I have you tagged as “likes to meow to calm down” 😂
Beans knows what's what.
All on Team Beans sound off!
May his path lead to warm sands.
May his butthole never have poop stuck to it
At that point I'd say cat deserves it
The kitty is about 10% chicken when it's done.
40minutes? You should have declared defeat as soon as he got it under the bed. At that point you weren't going to eat it were you?
Lots of cats have little to no portion control and will eat themselves sick. Even if you're not going to eat it anymore, you should at least take it away and give it back in small portions.
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Izza bird!
Iz MY bird!
Catching birds is why kitties exist!
Perfect guard kitty lol
no you stole my cat's name give it back :c
You named your cat Jeff too?
Are rotisserie chickens often small like that? It almost looks like a large quail.
Depends on the chicken, I have seen them come in different sizes from different places.
beenz
How many pounds was the chicken? I don't usually buy rotisserie chickens I don't know how much they weigh
~2 lbs
damn i overestimated. I was thinking 15. I usually do pork butts (shoulders) around 8-15 depending on the size of the pig and whether you left the bone in.
Beans hungers.
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