Yeah, it's kinda crazy that you can start in a small instance like this but can view and comment / post to other much larger instances but I think it only pulls over each one as you sub to it (if you're the first to do so from your instance) and even then only from that point in time onwards? Not 100% sure about this but it could explain the delay/refresh required.
But then you can also sub to kbin.social which isn't even Lemmy. And somehow you can comment from Mastodon to Lemmy which isn't even the same type of service / link aggrigator. It's a lot, but it's pretty cool learning how it all works.