A dark spirit has invaded
this post was submitted on 22 Apr 2026
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Paul, Bringer of Quiche
Protestants, stale coffee and donuts
Wilting veggie tray, grapes, and apple juice for the kiddos
Don't forget Orange Pekoe tea that has been brewing since 1890.
which is stale because fuck it as long as i didn't have to make breakfast
edit who am i kidding i'll spend a few dollars and take the missus out to brunch instead of subjecting her to church i'm not that mean
Drop ceilings and the squishy uneven carpeted floors of mobile classroom units. Shudders
Now here’s a person who’s heard “fellowship” used as a verb!
But protestant countries are full of awesome churches?
The post is referring to american protestant denominations like baptists, evangelicals, presbyterian, etc. as opposed to capital P Protestant churches. They're usually in smaller buildings that aren't full-time churches/ the space is often used for non-sermon church functions. For example, my childhood southern Baptist church was based out of a community center room that held ~40 people and hadnt been updated since the 80s
american protestant denominations
One of the items Luther was protesting about was that churches were too expensive and ostentatious. So, no, unless you know if some protestants that aren't actually in the protest.
Plenty of protestant denominations have lost the plot on the whole "protesting" bit. Joel osteen and Kenneth Copeland's churches are considered to be in the protestant vein of christianity and their whole thing is flaunting wealth and having big, expensive churches. Whether they should be considered protestant is for the various flavors of protestant to decide. As far as I'm aware, there's no broad consensus that defines protestantism besides "likes martin luther", and "hates catholics*"
I could be wrong but aren’t those considered Non-denominational these days
Despite being called "non-denominational", non-denominational christians are a broad group of independent churches and spiritual movements that fall under the protestant tradition. They aren't a part of larger, more organized subsect of protestant like the baptists or lutherans, but their non-denominational-ism refers to not being a part of/neatly defined by an organized denomination of protestantism. Non-denominational Christianity can even be a nucleation point for new denominations, like the burgeoning evangelical movement that's become a driving force in the fall of the american empire
They just aren't christians. Literally the thing that Jesus died for was him driving out the people buying and selling shit in the temple. They use his name and likeness to sell shit when he literally had a sermon saying that every single rich person deserved to burn in hell (a camel going through the eye of a needle is impossible, and yet easier than it is for a rich man to enter heaven). And they especially cannot claim to be part of anything Martin Luther did. They treat his list of complaints more like a god damned to-do list than anything.
🤷 that's a christian-to-christian thing to determine. I'd love for that to be the case, but seeing as most Christian organizations are perfectly fine with the status quo, I don't see that changing any time soon. Also, Martin Luther was a trash bag for plenty of reasons, I don't see any point in seeking to align oneself with a raging misogynist, antisemite, and author of "Against the Murderous, Theiving Hordes of Peasants", which was written in response to the German peasants war. Valid criticisms or not, the dude sucked and bred a religious movement that was just as bigoted, bloodthirsty, and money hungry as the catholics he was protesting
The post is referring to american protestant denominations like baptists, evangelicals, presbyterian, etc. as opposed to capital P Protestant churches.
They are still all capital P Protestant denominations. There is no European "Protestant church", those are also various denominations like Lutheran, Anglican, Calvinist, Reformist etc. etc.
Capital P in this instance is I believe referring to the 7 historical american Protestant denominations. The folding chair and strip mall variety are usually offshoots of the historical denomination.
You're right, I was just using that to highlight the differences between American and European protestant churches. Most american churches have ~75 congregants and are fairly small operations run out of buildings that weren't built with the intention to be a church. As such, they usually lack the aesthetics associated with churches.
And to be fair, I've never been to a European protestant (of any variety) church, there's a cultural image in america of what the average European church looks like, and it's usually an older brick/stone building with high ceilings and round/arched windows, built with the intention of being a church. Many suburban american churches (this is where the folding chair trope comes from) looks more like this:
And this is a really nice example too, I had trouble finding one that reflected the true reality of many of these smaller churches.
The Lutheran Church my kids cub scout pack meets in is really built more like a school or community center than a church. It's got the school hallway vibe in the Sunday School area (just with small classrooms appropriate for up to about 8 students each) and the gym/stage area has strong community center vibes
It's a lot like the example picture just without the foux stained glass or lounge stage lighting
Can confirm, German churches are cool Nevertheless the meme is funny
Almost all of which were built before the reformation.
Ulm Minster, Cologne Cathedral, Speyerer Dom, the Berlin Cathedral, all originally Catholic.
England is a better example since their brand of Protestantism really favored big works to rival the Catholics.
Cologne Cathedral, Speyerer Dom
Bad examples, those two are they're still catholic.
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Those aren't really Protestant churches, are they? Aren't they Anglican Church or something?
The Anglican church is technically also a Protestant church.
Huh, didn't realise. It's for sure not catholic, but thought it was something in between.
Edit: Right, you did say technically. According to Wikipedia,
The degree of distinction between Protestant and Catholic tendencies within Anglicanism is routinely a matter of debate both within specific Anglican churches and the Anglican Communion.
TIL! Thank you, I thought the Protestant split happened way earlier
Weren't most of them Catholic when they were built?
That's true for most of Europe, since protestant split happened so late
The words they’re looking for is “evangelical” or “nondenominational.”
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That would be the only soulslike on steam I might buy.
Holy shit. I've played through all of the souls games and only just now am realizing just how many churches are in the games.
Japanese know that churches are cool for boss fights.
I have only played DS3 and ER. If i remember correctly, DS3 includes 1 big ass abbey (they call it cathedral), 1 big ass cathedral... annor londo isnt a catholic temple, but it has the looks for sure
plus scattered churches.spoiler
And beneath it, there is another freaking temple
ER does not look like it gives churches that kind of protagonism apart from cult of marika
In Dark Souls 1 one of the most important boss fights is on the roof of a church you fight your way through to get on top of, and of course the same Anor Londo is there.
The only one I can remember in Dark Souls 2 is the place you fight Ornstein. The architecture in 2 is quite a bit different from the rest of the series. Probably because it wasn't Miyazaki.
Didn't the japanese flip the fuck out when assassins Creed had some missions inside japanese temples because it was sacrilegious? Seems a bit hypocritical.
#"MY GOD HERE COMES THE TARNISHED WITH A STEEL CHAIR!!"
Strip mall fundie cult backrooms.
I'd play that.
Works best if it’s next door to a Spirit Halloween shop. The cults of bad religion and consumer spook night are the last decomposers to show up on the carcass of a dead suburban intersection.
I'm pretty sure that's just the average modern zombie game. Everyone of them has a mall level.
username checks out :D
Funnily enough, my name's origin predates Elden Ring, but still souls related. I was making a build for:
Tbh dark souls 3 had too many cathedrals, so I'd be okay with a few rooms with folding chairs.
I'd be pretty happy with just a 'realistic' dark souls setting. The wild views were great in the various games, but now give me a perfectly rendered recreation of actual castles and medieval villages to romp through, with the occasional huge reptile ripping through a village's eastern quarter as I race to the well to raise the bucket of water that is its only weakness.
How about modern liminal settings. A subway car at 3am. A Waffle house restroom. A closed stripmall.
Not a Souls game but Alan Wake 2 has some great liminal spaces.
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Luthern Dark Souls is more horrifying than you could possibly imagine.
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