BMW: Why do my turn signals hurt?

Morpheus: You’ve never used them.

Too lazy to make the actual meme tonight. Someone else do it for me.

Best “car guy” trope I’ve ever heard is that BMW signals work fine and the drivers use them. They just emit a spectrum of light that the poors can’t see.

As a BMW driver myself, I’m on the opposite end of that spectrum. I signal my intent to an obnoxious degree. If I get into an accident, the other motorist can’t claim they didn’t know where I was going.

Oh shit, your house blew over onto its side. You should probably get that fixed.

Turn it off! Every blinker has a limited number of blinks, and do you know how much a BMW dealer will charge to refill it?

It's pointing at the speed you should be going. Stop impeding traffic.

Just ignore it man. Mines been doing that for months.

This is Tesla's now. Fuckin Nazi's hate turn signals.

My car has "BMW style" turn signals. When you flip them they don't move to a different position. They always just flick back. And they try to just always reset themselves on both turns and lane changes. I've mostly gotten used to them but occasionally you get into this infuriating loop where if you change your mind about a turn or lane change and you go to flick it in the opposite direction to reset it, it thinks you want to turn in that direction. And then you do it again in the original direction trying to fix that.

Anyway it's hella annoying. After three model years with this feature they reverted it back to the normal way. There's an aftermarket wiring harness you can buy to retrofit your car with the older stalks.

My point is I have a little sympathy for BMW drivers since they have these stupid turn signals and it's probably so entrenched in their loyal customers they can't change it.

BMW used to be king arsehole of UK roads, back in the 1990s. This mantle was usurped by Audi in the new millennium but not everywhere it seems.

I own a 2025 BMW and the fucking thing's lane assist will actively and agressive fight me if I try to switch lanes without putting on my signal lights. I am not your typical BMW driver, so of course now I make it a habit to use my signals, not just to turn or exit, but also to switch lanes.

My boomer energy cousin just deactivated the feature in his car.

To me this joke should be about Teslas, not BMW...

Just based on what im seeing when driving. I was starting to think that Tesla made that function very difficult to use or something.

Yes, this is very dangerous. With BMW, Mercedes and Audi, leaving this light on for more than 3 ticks will cause an explosion. That's why you never see these brands using their turn signal.

"What is that useless pedal to the left of the accelerator for?"

I miss old BMWs. They're just like the Coach purse of cars now

That one is only relevant to other drivers that aren’t you so don’t worry about it.

Looks suspicious. You should immediately pull off on the right shoulder.

Just turn right, it'll go away.

its a alternative check engine light.

Tide directional sensor. It's just showing where the moon is, you can ignore it.

The peasants don’t need to know where I am going.

Does it stay on, or is it blinking?

Typical bmw driver, checks out

Check your blinker fluid 🧐