You know, I haven't lived a perfect life. I've done things that I regret. I've broken hearts. I've burned bridges. I've let people down. These failures don't define my life, but, like most folks who aren't complete narcissists or psychopaths, I have my share of regrets. Like most, I've had dark moments where I wonder if I'm truly a good person, or if the world would be better off without me. I'm fine now, but life has had its ups and downs.
But moments like these are a useful salve for such feelings. The regrets I have are a big deal in my life, but nothing compared to this. My regrets are thing like when I've burned out of a job due to ADHD, let my coworkers pick up the slack, and then quit on short notice when I hit a wall, leaving them holding the bag. Or when I had to break up with someone I had been with for years, in a relationship where mutual feelings still existed, simply because of incompatible life and relationship goals. Or how, despite all we tried, we weren't able to save my little brother from the opioid epidemic; the fact that I as an older sibling wasn't able to save my little brother. Or times I've let my spouse down. These are the kinds of regrets that eat at my soul. And I've never physically hurt anyone, never cheated on a partner. Just ordinary life regrets.
Those are the kinds of regrets I have. Those are the things that when I'm at my worst make me feel like a monster. I know none of those are objectively evil acts. But feelings aren't rational.
But then I look at someone like Tate. I feel grief and shame for things that aren't even really my fault. And this man is unrepentant despite a lifetime of committing the most vile acts a human being can commit. Human trafficking. Rape. Child pornography. He unapologetically treated human beings as disposable trash, on a mass scale, and bragged to the world about it. That is a universe of evil that is simply beyond my understanding.
Some say God has a plan or purpose for everyone. I think Andrew Tate's purpose, if he has any at all, is to be such a human monster, that ordinary people, healthy but flawed human beings, can get a reality check on their own self-doubts and self-hate. If there is any good at all that has come from Tate's life, it would have to be something like this. This tiniest of silver linings in cloud of pus and shit.
