this post was submitted on 05 Aug 2026
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“There has been more of a transition where parents are supporting their adult children for longer,” she said. “The data do show that more young adult men live with their parents than women. The wealth transfer from older generations to younger generations is part of that story.”

And then there are the partners. “Almost everybody you talk to will have a story” about supporting an unemployed man, Ullrich said, adding that what’s changed isn’t the dynamic itself, but the fact that it no longer carries the stigma it once did. The stay-at-home boyfriend, once a punchline, is now a statistically significant labor market phenomenon.

A landmark paper published in the Journal of Political Economy, first circulated through the National Bureau of Economic Research, found that roughly 70% of the hours young men aren’t working are being spent on video games and recreational computer use. The economists calculated that improvements in gaming technology since 2004 alone can explain nearly half the increase in young men’s leisure hours.

“I think that’s part of the story — the basement story,” Ullrich said, in reference to a trope of young men playing video games in their parent’s basement.

The opioid epidemic compounded it, hitting non-college-educated men especially hard. And critically, men, compared to women, largely don’t qualify for government assistance programs like SNAP or TANF without a disability, meaning when they exit the workforce, the financial burden falls on whoever is closest to them.

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[–] captainlezbian@lemmy.world 14 points 1 week ago (4 children)

Well shit, that's a concern. Like it's totally cool if they're doing chores and that's what's been agreed to or they're looking for work, it's rough out there and I've had periods of unemployment myself. But it's bad for everyone when an adult is a non-contributing dependent with no disability or path forward

[–] velma@sh.itjust.works 16 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Yeah this isn't a great sign as far as job availability and such goes. It's tough on these guys and doubled because of the societal expectation that men are providers.

[–] captainlezbian@lemmy.world 7 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Yeah, hopefully this will be an opportunity for our culture to shed the idea that men have to be providers to contribute to their households properly as men.

Like, if they're just being stay at home partners who pick up the financial side of their slack with household labor then that's my only real worry outside the fact that every belt has been getting kinda tight.

But also NEETrot is real and that's where a lot of my concern is. I've been on both sides of it and it really sucks for all involved, especially if you aren't getting out and doing things. I worry for these men's mental health and ability to sustain themselves as well as their ability to leave potentially abusive situations they may find themselves in.

[–] velma@sh.itjust.works 3 points 1 week ago

I completely agree on every point. It can be dangerous to be the partner that is at home and dependent on the working partner.

More equality is better for men! I'm sure there's a lot of men that are quite suited to being the stay-at-home parent and would love the opportunity and freedom to do so without the stigma.

If chores are taking-up more than 30% of an unemployed person's (waking)free-time, something has gone very wrong. I feel the same way about the free-time of the employed as-well, but that's 25% of another topic.

[–] Tollana1234567@lemmy.today 2 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago)

im not surpsied there are posts/stories that appear right after the layoffs, people are unable to find jobs due to AI screening, ATS systems tha t companies use.

theres alot of posts like this on other platform. 1 or more sibling/children does nothing(no job, no education, or purposely chose a very low amount of hours for a job so they can just play games or doomscroll at home) in thier 20s,30s, 40s and beyond. and the family that do "partially launch/launch as they should" nag on the siblings. i also notice the ones that arnt leeching tend to develop significant resentment of that non-contributer and even subsconsciously wishing they end up homless. enabling parents are also problematic when they allow it to happen too.