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[-] TheTechnician27@lemmy.world 76 points 5 months ago

New business idea: fortune cookie text but on tampon wrappers.

[-] neuracnu@lemmy.blahaj.zone 73 points 5 months ago

Your lucky numbers are #ff0000

[-] LemonLicker999@piefed.blahaj.zone 8 points 5 months ago

YES THIS ๐Ÿคฃ๐Ÿคฃ

[-] faythofdragons@slrpnk.net 30 points 5 months ago

Swear to god, if I unwrap a tampon that says "help, I'm trapped in a fortune cookie factory"...

[-] phx@lemmy.world 8 points 5 months ago

Huh, they spelled cookie wrong and used a "ch" instead of a "k"

[-] betterdeadthanreddit@lemmy.world 6 points 5 months ago

Or tampon roulette: individually wrapped and bagged in sets of 6 but one has a capsaicin-saturated core. Maybe get a few friends with synced cycles so everybody draws one and waits to see who [won / lost].

[-] mojofrododojo@lemmy.world 20 points 5 months ago

but one has a capsaicin-saturated core.

do you want a pack of angry women to beat you half to death and leave that thing in your ass? because holy shit man, they're already on their periods, shit like this is war

"Now is the time to act"

"Business will go your way

[-] Gork@sopuli.xyz 37 points 5 months ago

Such words of wisdom from the most humble of packaging.

[-] GreenKnight23@lemmy.world 33 points 5 months ago

go fuck yourself

I'll have to for the next week...

[-] Lost_My_Mind@lemmy.world 5 points 5 months ago

......you're a guy??? I've been picturing you as a 23 year old lesbian with purple hair, and 327 charm bracelets, but not worn on your wrists.

[-] GreenKnight23@lemmy.world 18 points 5 months ago

I can be whatever you want me to be if the price is good.

but as they say. no money, no honey.

[-] trashgirlfriend@lemmy.world 4 points 5 months ago

Gay for pays lesser known cousin, fem for pay

[-] Hideakikarate@sh.itjust.works 9 points 5 months ago
[-] GreenKnight23@lemmy.world 3 points 5 months ago

sad suck for a buck.

๐Ÿ˜ญ

[-] BagOfHeavyStones@piefed.social 9 points 5 months ago

Lass for Cash.

[-] GreenKnight23@lemmy.world 3 points 5 months ago

I just hope my beard doesn't give me away.

[-] trashgirlfriend@lemmy.world 2 points 5 months ago

razors have been around for a minute, get chopping girliepop

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[-] colourlessidea@sopuli.xyz 4 points 5 months ago* (last edited 5 months ago)

To be fair, nearly anyone can fuck themself regardless of gender

Edit: clarity

[-] SlurpingPus@lemmy.world 2 points 5 months ago

Broken arms eh.

[-] Zier@fedia.io 30 points 5 months ago

Can we print these phrases on condoms?

[-] WeirdGoesPro@lemmy.dbzer0.com 46 points 5 months ago

Be unstoppable.

๐Ÿ˜ฌ

[-] Routhinator@startrek.website 11 points 5 months ago

Wait, is this message for the woman, or her period?

[-] phx@lemmy.world 7 points 5 months ago

"these tampons didn't do anything and my undergarments are now ruined!"

'well duh, didn't you read the side of the packaging?'

[-] Vinylraupe@lemmy.zip 24 points 5 months ago

I read "be unemployed" on the last one ๐Ÿคฃ๐Ÿคฃ

[-] Tikiporch@lemmy.world 13 points 5 months ago

Be unemployable.

[-] MidsizedSedan@lemmy.world 22 points 5 months ago

Wait until she hears about man flu. Phew. That sucks.

/sAll jokes aside. I'm growing my hair out. Last hair cut 2 years ago. Learning hair maintainemce, from my sister, who is a mother. Hard work dealing with kids, periods, hair, make up, work, shaving, AND with men being a possible threat every night out. (I'm sure that's the wrong order of importance, but cough cough, I think man flu is coming up again...)

I always joke with the line from Ron Weasly. "No one can feel all that. They will explode"

[-] W98BSoD@lemmy.dbzer0.com 61 points 5 months ago
[-] Fedizen@lemmy.world 5 points 5 months ago
[-] 87Six@lemmy.zip 3 points 5 months ago

Thought we'd get one last picture before you died

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[-] 87Six@lemmy.zip 3 points 5 months ago

That's me right now and my blocked nostril just switched jobs with my runny nostril, is this a good sign?

[-] sem@piefed.blahaj.zone 13 points 5 months ago

"Work like a champion" fuck you!

[-] Overwrite7445@lemmy.ca 22 points 5 months ago
[-] lemmock@lemmy.world 6 points 5 months ago

My 50 year old knees: "Fuck you!"

[-] bridgeburner@lemmy.world 17 points 5 months ago
[-] sem@piefed.blahaj.zone 3 points 5 months ago

๐Ÿ˜…๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜Ž

[-] hansolo@lemmy.today 9 points 5 months ago

So is this the tampon version of the sayings on Dove chocolate wrappers?

[-] merde@sh.itjust.works 9 points 5 months ago

at least he himself is trying to "live fearlessly" by sending that joke to a woman who is probably already cramping her way through a bloody day

[-] Wren@lemmy.today 7 points 5 months ago

Tampons should look like lightsabers and make a Shwung sound when you open them. Also, dye the cotton lightsaber colours. I don't give a shit about toxic whatever the fuck, I want to desecrate something beautiful with my womanly body.

[-] CaptPretentious@lemmy.world 2 points 5 months ago

I mean, it would increase sales. But that's because light saber. When I was a kid I would have pissed off so many women, because dumb kid + 'lightsaber' = pissed off adults

[-] Wren@lemmy.today 3 points 5 months ago

I had an 18 year old boyfriend steal one because he thought it was candy, so no change there.

[-] CaptPretentious@lemmy.world 2 points 5 months ago

I could understand an 8 year old. But 18!

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[-] Janx@piefed.social 4 points 5 months ago

It sounds like she is living fearlessly! So brave...

[-] UndergroundParking@lemmy.cafe 4 points 5 months ago

Thanks, we're both crying out loud now! :D

[-] BarneyPiccolo@lemmy.today 3 points 5 months ago

Like the captions under those generic photos you see in corporate conference rooms. Which ones? Who knows, they all look the same.

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this post was submitted on 13 Apr 2026
972 points (99.6% liked)

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